But to surrender, I just wept and regretted this moment

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Note: The title of this chapter is a lyric from "Fight Test" by the Flaming Lips.

MC and Noah were both distressed about how Bobby had found out about them. Noah felt strongly that he talk to his friend about his relationship with MC, and wanted things to be okay between them. Since it was rare that they were close enough to meet up, Bobby agreed to meet him the next day. June wasn't too pleased, but she couldn't really complain after dominating Bobby's attention while he had been with MC.

When Bobby spotted Noah entering the coffee shop, he jumped up enthusiastically and waved him over. Noah gave him a composed smile, and came over to greet him. Bobby felt short and inadequate next to Noah. Noah was tall, dark, and handsome incarnate. His brain burned at the thought of Noah touching MC, being the one who got to see all of her hidden bits, physical and emotional.

"Thanks for meeting me" Noah said.

"Of course! Happy to." Bobby said a little too brightly.

"I just really wanted to talk to you about MC, and make sure we're okay. Or answer any questions. I just want to be respectful of what you guys had. I know you texted with MC a bit yesterday, but you're my mate, and I wanted to check in too."

Bobby was surprised that Noah was being so open about this, and so willing to take on such a potentially difficult conversation. The Noah he had known tended to be quiet, a little surly, and a bit avoidant of confrontation. He was begrudgingly impressed. It was clear that MC had talked to him about her and Bobby. He felt a little secret spark in his chest that she was still thinking about him. Still talking about him in her new relationship. Relationship. He assumed that's what it was. it must be fairly serious between them, since Noah was making this effort, and when he had seen them together, they already seemed to have a comfortable familiarity.

"So, anything in particular you want to know?" Noah offered.

Bobby thought for a moment. "How did this come about?"

Noah wanted to be able to say that he hadn't looked for this. That they had run into each other and things just happened. But that wasn't the case. "It was...kind of a romantic gesture on my part." He said nervously, bracing for Bobby's reaction. "I had been thinking about her, and I looked her up. I saw that she was playing here. So I came to her show and surprised her. Waited for her afterwards, and invited her to my place."

The words hurt Bobby. His eyes stung, thinking of how she must have felt when she saw Noah. How readily did she fall for him, he wondered.

"So you had heard we had broken up?"

"Oh yeah! I would have never approached her if you guys were still together. Please believe that."

So nothing was going on between you at the Villa? he wanted to ask. But he was too afraid.

Noah continued. "I want to be honest with you. I have had feelings for her for a long time. On some level, since the Villa. But I had never talked to her about it. I never pursued her until I found out that she was single again."

Single again. Those words smarted Bobby's raw heart.

"Good taste evidently." Bobby joked, then added. "I can't blame you for having those feelings. Who wouldn't feel that way about MC?"

"It's true," Noah replied, seriously.

Noah's sincerity was poking at a tender spot in Bobby's chest. He looked across at his friend, and recognized that look. He'd seen it on his own face so many times.

"We're just the two lads who were lucky enough to actually get a shot." he said lightly. Noah could sense the strain in his joke.

Bobby frowned for a moment looking down at his untouched coffee and croissant. Croissants were her favorite. He took a deep breath, and looked at Noah resolutely. "Good. She deserves someone who will go out of their way for her. She deserves to feel like her guy will chase her to keep her if he has to." As he said the words, the weight of how he had failed her crashed down on him. Noah had showed up for her in a way that he hadn't. Why hadn't he tried harder?

"I'd do anything to keep her happy, mate. I want you to know that. I don't know if this will make it harder or easier for you, but I want to be upfront. This isn't just a casual thing. I'm in love with her."

Bobby wiped a tear away. This was brutal. But some part of him was glad to hear this. Maybe MC would be really happy with Noah. He wanted that for her. At least he could be comforted by the fact that she had moved on to something better than what he had offered her.

"I didn't rise to the occasion the way she needed me to. I ran away when she stopped being fun." he frowned, looking away. "I guess I learned something about myself that I'm not very proud of." He wiped another tear away. "But it's what happened. I can't undo it. I just want to make sure that you don't make the same mistake."

"I'm going to do my best."

Bobby felt tired and hollow. He was quiet for a moment, then asked, "Does Hope know?"

"Yeah I talked to her about it. Initially she was a little concerned that MC and I had been up to stuff in the Villa that she never knew about. But I let her know that nothing ever happened between us then."

Bobby released an internal sigh of relief. He didn't think she would do that to him, and it didn't feel fair to ask, but it was nice to have the confirmation.

Noah continued, "She was a bit upset that MC hadn't come to her first, but I had asked MC to wait until I got a chance to talk to her. She gave us her blessing, I guess." His tone brightened. "Hope is doing well. I think she realized a few things about herself when watching the show back. She's grown a lot. She's dating a new guy who seems like a good match."

"That's great," Bobby said halfheartedly.

"How are things going with June?" Noah asked.

"Uh, good! I mean, June is great!" This wasn't a lie. Things had been good with June. But they were regular-good with her. Not MC-magical-whirlwind-head-spinning good. He felt guilty at this realization. "I guess I'm still working through past stuff myself, you know?"

"Absolutely. I know MC definitely is. It's a lot to process."

Bobby felt a sharp longing for MC. He wished he could be there for her as she processed. He knew that was silly, since he was the cause of her grief. But he just missed her so damn much all of a sudden. Wanted to hold her and feel her and taste her again. That deep burning jealousy flooded his body as he realized Noah was going to go home and do just that.

Bobby looked down at his croissant again. "Hey, I'm not going to eat this. Would you mind taking this to MC for me? They're her favorite."

"Sure thing." Noah agreed. "Look, I know this probably isn't realistic for awhile, but I hope we can still be friends, and be in each other's lives again. I miss you!" He said genuinely.

"Definitely. Thanks for talking to me about all this." They stood up to hug goodbye. "Treat her like a goddess, okay? And tell her..." he hesitated, but continued on, "Tell her she's the best woman I've ever known."

"I will, and I agree." Noah made his way out, croissant in hand.

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