A F T E R D A R K | PAUL LAHOTE - 1

54

"Alice I can't stand here and wait for—" I began incredulously, my anxiety taking the handle of my emotions and stirring the pot in my head. My phone started to buzz again in my hand and I looked down to the caller before twisting my face in despair and ignoring it, "—Urgh! God."

"What is it?" Alice asked me, as if she didn't know the problem I was having at the minute.

"The problem is, every man and his dog is calling me because I literally disappeared on them last night and I can't answer any of their calls!" I snapped at her quickly.

Since dawn I had been getting phone call after phone call from everyone who had my number. The coven and the packs were calling me non-stop and I couldn't pick up the phone to tell them why I'd suddenly disappeared. The hardest part was knowing that they were probably thinking I'd decided at the last minute to flee while I still could. They probably thought I'd had second thoughts about facing the Volturi but that wasn't the case. I just wish I could've answered and told them where I was and what I was doing but they didn't know Alice was back with the solution to our problem.

I knew the Volturi were on their way though, if not almost there.

With a lump in my throat I turned my phone off and slid it into my back pocket as we reached the outskirts of Forks. I sighed, dragging my fingers through my hair. The guilt I felt right now was second to none and it was something Jasper couldn't even get rid of. I felt as if I was leaving them to fend for themselves — without sounding big headed I was the strongest person they had on their side and all of a sudden I'd disappeared on them. Not to mention how worried they probably would be — Paul, Jacob, Esme. I could see their worried frowns now, picture them in my head as they thought about the prospect of something having happened to me. 

"They need me Alice." I sighed in desperation.

"And you'll be there." She told me, "Just not straight away."

"I'm the worst person in the world." I groaned. I just hoped that if they were worrying about me they didn't let it affect them because the Voltrui would see that weakness and use it to their advantage.

"You're not. They'll understand." Jasper tried to comfort me.

Nahuel and his aunt had just separated from us, they would be waiting a safe distance away for the right time while Alice, Jasper and I took a short cut through Forks in order to get to the battlefield quicker.

God I hated calling it a battlefield.

I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to anyone, should my vision actually happen, and that really tore me in two. The last interaction I'd had with many and it made me feel physically sick. Another problem my overanalysing brain conjured up was that the partnership between the packs and us would be exposed and if the Volturi didn't kill us for Renesmee they'd surely kill us for that. Aro would know I was mated, as they called it, to a werewolf and that just spelled disaster.

I couldn't stay calm. Not now and not here when I didn't know what was happening. Somebody could be dying, the Volturi could be pointing fingers.

My heart thumped erratically in my chest, the palms of my hands sweated.

"A-Alice." I stuttered out.

"What?" She asked softly, walking over to me.

"I-I—" I put my hand on my chest, "—I can't breathe."

Jasper walked to me but stayed a metre or so away, it was like he was trying to comfort me but give me the space I needed at the same time.

"You're having a panic attack, Sophia." Alice told me, "It's not going to go away until you calm down and start focusing on your breathing."