best

20

"Ready?" Luke spoke with a smile in my doorframe, glancing around my room as I stood in the middle of it, saying my silent goodbyes.

"Yeah" I exhaled with the smallest smile, following him down the hall.

We went to his car, where I buckled up, hearing Nick.

"Aubrey?" He spoke quietly, making me hum lightly.

"We're not coming back?" He questioned slowly.

I could feel Luke looking at me.

I turned to him, avoiding looking at Luke.

"No, buddy" I smiled, reaching my hand back, feeling him grab my own gently.

He went silent as Luke backed up.

"What about our Christmas tree?" He asked.

I laughed lightly, seeing Luke smile.

"We have a Christmas tree at my house, Nick" he chimed in slowly.

"I don't think it will be the same" he mumbled.

Me neither.

I didn't even know what to say.

Luke cleared his throat, as if begging me to say something.

"It'll be okay" my voice was weak as I spoke to him quietly.

"Sometimes it's fun to get new things, to switch things up" I convinced him and myself as I spoke.

He gave me a nod, squeezing my hand lightly, making me squeeze it right back.

We got back to Luke's house, him assisting us in taking our things to our newly designated bedrooms.

I silently put all of my clothes up as I listened to Luke and Nick laughing and playing as they put his stuff up.

I smiled at the sound of Nick's true, loud laugh- which I felt like I hadn't heard in so long.

I grabbed my picture frame, sinking against the wall with it.

I looked to my mom and dad, seeing my mom holding her baby bump, my dad kissing her cheek as he held me close to him.

As I let my head hit the wall, I saw Calum appear in my doorway.

"Anxiety?" I saw panic flash through his face.

"I'm fine" I spoke quietly.

He pushed my door shut, sitting criss cross in front of me

"I got off of work early to hang with you" he smiled proudly.

"Thank you" I smiled lightly.

"What do you have?" He asked, nodding to my picture.

I slowly showed him.

"That's my family" I spoke quietly.

He looked to it, a smile coming across his face.

"I'm assuming you were around- ten or eleven?" He smiled.

"Eleven" I nodded firmly, feeling the lump in my throat.

His eyes met mine.

"What happened?" He asked quietly

I didn't have a problem telling people what happened- it made me emotional, but I had to face it.

"My mom passed away from a blood clot after having Nick through a c-section" I mumbled slowly.

"And then my dad drowned himself in our family bathtub" I finished, clearing my throat lightly.

His face softened.

"But Nick doesn't know and that's not exactly something I want him to know, so help me keep that a secret please" I mumbled towards him.

He nodded lightly,

"How are you doing?" He asked me as I heard Nick's loud laughter, he came running into the room, almost pouncing into my arms.

"Protect me!" He yelled out as Luke ran in after him, a wide smile on his face.

As much as I wanted to love how happy they all made each other

I couldn't help but feel scared