The Sound of a Siren's Call

20.) Reunions and Recountings

Juniper's arms were around me in a heartbeat.

"Are you ok?" I demanded at last.

"Yeah. Are you?"

I nodded, a part of me resenting how much I'd missed her. I missed talking, I tried to tell me, but I felt the lie.

"Did they hurt you?"

"Not much. You?" 

"Not much?" The rage must've shown on my face.

"What do you care, Arriana?" She looked tired. Both of us had gotten over our excitement.

I pulled back. "I'm allowed to not want you hurt, aren't I?"

She shrugged, her hands gripping the metal tub. She winced and I leaned forward again.

"Can I do anything to help?" My thumb stuck up like a poor plea.

She shook her head. Then she let go. "Why did you come back for me?"

"Why did you let me get away?"

She pursed her lips. "Good point."

The man I now realized with dread was the captain sat easily in a chair. I didn't notice until Juniper looked at him.

Juniper was signing, perfectly in sync with what he was saying.

"I'm going to need your cooperation. So no singing or magic or any of that stuff. Got it? If you do, you'll regret it."

We both nodded, and Juniper verbally confirmed she understood.

"Now that's settled, we can't afford to take on a ton of idle passengers. What can you do?"

I looked at Juniper.

She signed as she spoke. "She's helpful on a ship. She knows all the rigging like the back of her hand is excellent at navigation. She's a natural sailor if you ever saw one. And I... I can translate. And I'm good at navigating."

He rubbed mustache, twirling it in circles around his finger.

"You," Juniper translated, pointing to me, "join the men manning the sails. You," she pointed to herself, "help with navigation."

I nodded, but he didn't move. He just sat there, almost statuesque. Except no artist had ever made such a crude statue that I had seen.

I turned back to Juniper. She met my eyes. "Castor? He's alright?"

I nodded. "You taught him fingerspelling?"

"Yes," she looked briefly miserable.

"Juniper, how do I make him not like me?

She looked at me. "You can't just make someone not like you."

"Sure you can. So how do you do it?"

She smiled then. "You don't like him?"

"Not like he likes me."

"Just tell him then." Her eyes lit up.

"Gosh, I don't think I could go back to fingerspelling everything."

"So I'll tell him."

"And you'll tell him you like him?"

Her smile disappeared as though someone had wiped it off.

"I don't like him."

I stopped. Had I been wrong? Then I could be wrong about Castor too.

But Juniper's cheeks were red as cherries. I wasn't wrong.

"It's never going to happen if you don't tell him."

"I know that!" She signed quickly. I wondered if she'd hit her head when she signed know.

"So tell him."

"He like you. He's not going to like me."

I should've said, I like you. Or, Then he's an idiot.

I didn't. I just stayed quiet, affirming her statement. Affirming that no, he wouldn't like her.

She stiffened. "You have it all, Arianna. You know that?"

"You know, I really do. Murderous mother? Check. Miserable family? Check. Communication barrier on a hostile ship? Check. Problematic love life? Check."

"You don't get it, do you? You have a life, Arrianna. You're free to go wherever you want. You have a family. That's more than some of us."

"You can go wherever you want." I pointed out.

"Wherever I want with one tiny asterisk."

I didn't move. I didn't say anything.

"It has to be in the sea. I can't just get up and walk around, Arriana. Whatever you think."

"So you're jealous that I'm half-human?"

"Not jealous. I'm not jealous."

"You realize how little I fit in, right? At least you belong somewhere. You're not part one thing and part another."

"Maybe I don't want to be a siren."

I paused. "Juniper..."

"Maybe I want to be human again."

"Again?" She was mad at me, but that one word consumed all my attention. Again?

She looked shocked. "Yeah, again. You know..."

And then she paled. "You really don't know?"

"Know what?"

"How sirens are made."

I shook my head. My parents had never talked about anything. In fact, my father carefully avoided talking about my mother before I was born. He acted as though it were all irrelevant.

"We all start off as humans, Arriana. Every single one of us. It's how your parents fell in love and it's why a half siren is possible."

"So what happens?"

"I don't remember it that well. None of us do, but there are legends. You know the Sea God?"

I shivered. Nigel was the only person I'd ever known who was religious. He'd tried to school me in the ways of the gods and how to worship them. It hadn't stuck, but I could still remember his hand in a "p" imitating the waves. That sign was the little I remembered about the god he claimed controlled the seas.

I just nodded numbly.

"He had a daughter. No one knows her name. The only thing we really know about her is she drowned and with her last breath, she called out to her father. Then she transformed into the first siren so she could continue living in her father's sea. The Sea God then extended the blessing or curse, depending on how you look at it, to all young women about to die a watery death."

I frowned. It sounded like a story Nigel would tell town children to keep them away from the sea.

"How do you know it's true?"

"We've lived it. All of us."

"Then how is there a half siren? How am I possible?"

"Your mother was pregnant when... you know."

I put my head in my hands. I'd always had a vague sense that sirens were immortal. My mother took great pride in the fact she didn't age. It'd never dawned on me to ask how old any of the women were. It dawned on me then.

"I've lost track, being completely honest." Juniper looked almost ashamed.

"I'm sorry." I rubbed my fist on my chest, hoping it would make amends.

"It's not your fault no one told you," she signed back, looking miserable.

But I began to wonder if it had been. I'd never been the best at paying attention. There was always something that seemed more important than Nigel's lessons. More important than my mother's ramblings.

If I'd missed that, how much more was there?