random ranting

More Random Ranting

   Sorry for not updating sooner! I'm in the second quarter of my tenth grade year. Life has gotten crazier than usual. Homework consumes all of my time, and what free time I do have is spent helping my mom. I'm currently going to a charter school for smart kids. I feel dumb next to them, but math has gotten easier.

   It has been a hard few months. Travel is crazy because to get home from school, I have to take a train, a bus, and walk a quarter mile home. The travel usually takes about an hour, occasionally more. The homework just piles up and I stay up to eleven most nights doing work.

   I have had trouble getting to sleep lately. I just feel tired all the time, but when I try to sleep, I suddenly can't. It's frustrating.

   I'm having trouble making friends at my new school. I'm always so busy anyway. It's just hard trying to do this on my own. I just keep my feelings to myself and pretend to be normal. On the inside, I feel pressured to be perfect. I struggle with feelings of loneliness, and fear of being looked at weirdly.

   In times like this, I turn to writing. In my English class in free time, I write. Writing really lets me feel less pressured, and calmer. I pour out my feelings on paper, often writing in pen because of the way it flows across the pages. It has really helped me cope with the craziness of my life.

   The summer was crazy with summer classes. I did have time to finish all of the Marvel movies (which were awesome) with my mom. I was glad to finally spend some quality time with her.

   I hope that it will get better from now on. I hope that you all are doing better than I am. Good luck this year!