I Loved You

THE GREATEST DANCE

To the Man Who Loved Me First
We would forever and always be best friends, but never really just friends. Hearing you say "I love" you created the sense of worth that I never knew I needed. Thank you for helping me believe in myself and showing me I was worth the love you gave me. I don't think you ever realize how much the things you did and said helped. Everything you did helped or saved me in one way or another, I don't think you ever realized that. There are people who believe that, we were too young to know what real love was. Love putting someone else's needs over your own. It's smiling and not knowing why someone can bring that much joy into your life. Letting go when all you want to do is hold on. Wiping away tears that you didn't cause. Just being there no matter what or when needed. That is and was  always the love that you gave me. It was a love so pure that it was always safe and true. Something that we shared that no one ever really understood it. We never cared about the looks or listen to the gossip about us. Together we walked through it all, never thinking twice. Laughing at how really stupid it was, the things that didn't matter. I knew you better than most, but you knew me better than I did sometimes. There was nothing that could scare us away or apart, we knew it all already. You were a light in the darkness, laughter that chased away the sadness. We spent more time as friends than we did in a relationship, it was always you that I ran to. Time would forever and always be ours. I always thought there'd be more time Using there'd or were are words I never thought I'd use when talking about us, something I can't get used to! I gave you my whole heart and never really got it back. It's something over the years I realized I didn't want back, it was safe and at home with you. You never let it get completely broken, always helping me put it together again after another heartbreak. A simple phone call would change that all the day you died. In a few minutes my whole world would be completely broken and upside down, without you to help me through it this time. I knew nothing would ever be the same, there'd never be another love like yours. My very best friend, the person I was going to grow old with was forever gone! You were my first real true love. It was always going to be you I that I was planning on being with in the end. We made each other promise at thirty we were single we'd get married, I wasn't going to wait that long, even if I had to ask you! Your mom looked at me and told me she thought we'd get married! All I could do not to cry was hug her tightly and tell her I thought we'd get married too. That was the second thing to break my heart a little more in twenty four hours! Across the hall would be the third, everything just as you'd left it the day before. That picture of me on your nightstand Ordered it for you, it was your favorite out of my senior pictures. A year and a half later you still had it up. You were and still are up in pictures in my home. The day we buried you half of my heart went with you. You knew I know ever really loved one other person but not as completely as I loved you! I wasted time being stupid and crazy thinking someone could ever love me like you did! Now that it's too late and impossible to ever know I'm left with questions Was I your always? Did you know I loved you always? That you were where I felt the safest? Thanks for the greatest dance of my life! You will forever be my always! My greatest "what if" in life
Forever and always wishing you were here