A Little Death

funeral

" we know that Mr.harringtons soul is in heaven with our father right now". Pastor spoke

" amen" . we all said in unison. I hate funerals I couldn't stand to see the sight of anything dead. My mother had
forced me into being here this lovely Sunday afternoon . The Harrington's were a family friend. My mom and Ms.Harrington met when they were in college right before she dropped out, she was pregnant with me and my grandmother had kicked her out , she hated my father and rightfully so. Mrs. Harrington married harry the recently deceased that same year and they had a baby.  The Harrington's came from money I remember I used to go to there house back then I thought it was a castle.  I used to always make fun of Myles coming up with nicknames for him like little prince, and young charming.

I eyed Mrs.Harrington I could tell she was trying desperately hard to pull herself together. Next to her stood her son, I hadn't seen Myles since he was yeah high. We  played together till about the age of 8. He was a sweet boy. obsessed with art and anime . We would always paint  ,his room was filled with art supplies. He was also very protective I remember one time a boy at the playground had pushed me off of the swings and he'd found me crying .

He held me until I stopped  then opened a can of whoop ass on the suspect. he still had his brown curls  . He was about 5'11 pretty lean build he was wearing a black suit.

as far as funerals went this was pretty extravagant there was an orchestra,  pianist , a 90 inch led tv which we had watched a slide show of Mr. Harrington's life from his earliest years to the year he died.

I stood in a line with the others and dropped my rose into the casket . the ceremony had soon ended after that . My mom headed in the direction of
The Harringtons and i followed behind her.  We stopped in front  of Mrs.Harrington and Myles. I glanced at him. He was taller then me . He wasn't before infact I constantly teased him for it. He actually managed to surpass me. His face still had it's boyish cute features but his jawline and cheekbones which were now more prominent revealed his maturity. 

His mom and mine walked a few feet away to talk. I wonder if he even remembers me. Technically I'm older then him. I figured it'd be better to just say something in this awkward silence.

" hey I'm jesse you probably don't remember me which is ok I'm older so".

He let out a scoff

" your still claiming that, atleast you can't claim your taller anymore". He said looking down at me

" so you do remember me". I stated

" yeah I do.I'm not really in the mood for a stroll down memory lane". He said which was understandable were at his father's funeral not the best place to be catching up.

" that's understandable, I'm sorry about what happened to your father , he was a good man". I said giving my condolences

He let out another scoff

" he wasn't and everyone's sorry but I guess that's just what you say to people at these kinds of things" .

Just then pastor brown came .

" look at you little myles all grown up". Pastor brown said side hugging myles

" it's good to see you to pastor brown". Myles said shaking his hand. Something was different about him. He seemed distant and cold as a kid he was always smiling and warm.

I know it'd been some time since I'd seen him but for the short time that I've been in his presence I felt as though I'd never met him before.

" so I heard your moving back to town 
I hope to be seeing you in church it's good to stick with community in hard times like these. The church will help you get through your grief Ms. William's here is actually head of the choir I'm happy to  ". Pastor brown spoke

" no disrespect to you pastor or you Ms. William  but I'm a devote athiest so I don't think we'll be seeing much of each other"he stated

" wow an athiest , the little boy who sang his heart out in church the one who promised to paint me a mural even better then  Michaelangelo's , so no mural?" The pastor asked

"I'm afraid so". He replied

In that instance our mothers had returned. Mrs.Harrington looked a bit less depressed then before she had left so I guess my mother's magic had worked to some extent.

" I heard your  moving back into the old mansion?" . The priest questioned

" yes father brown, you should come over myles is also going to be attending florence high, isn't that the same highschool you go to jess". Mrs.Harrington asked I nodded in response

" great you two can become   the best of friends again which is great cause myles is kind of a loner.she said whispering the last part miles cleared his throat at her comment

" hopefully you can help him find his way back to the lord, he's always spouting this nonsense about being athiest if you ask me atheism is the segway to satanism". His mother said

" AMEN Mrs. Harrington". Pastor brown sang

" excuse me" . Myles said leaving the group I watched as he headed to a long black limo . He opened the door disappearing inside . Something about him was different,  something about him seemed dark.

I sat on my bed , thinking about the funeral. I couldn't help but think about my childhood bestfriend. .

* he wasn't." Who says that about there father during a  funeral. He seemed to not even care, he seemed like he didn't even want to be there. I mean people do grieve in different ways . An athiest of all things , I went to church with myles every Sunday we were part of the children's choir. He even met the Pope when he was six so how did he become an athiest . I couldn't help but wonder what happened in  all those years we spent apart .we were so  inseparable.
A part of me still cared for the goofy rut of the litter kid even after all these years.

his father's gone now I can't just leave him alone to go threw all of this. He needs a friend  now more then ever. Hopefully I can get him out of this athiest faze of his.

" monique ". I heard an all to familiar voice yell. Great he's back. I shut my lights and pretended to be sleeping. I took every and all opportunities I could to avoid my father. 

He was and has always been the worst . I had no idea why my mother put up with him , why she wouldn't just leave him.

My father was what elders at the church would call a " godless heathen" he was an adulterer an alcoholic, a drug addict and an abuser. Right around this time he'd come home junk ranting about dinner and how we were worthless as woman in the house.I often prayed for him but they have have yet to be answered.

I closed the lights. I had school in the morning then I had to stop by church. I love my mom but I seriously couldn't wait to get out of this hole in the ground.