Better man

Sober

*****this is the longest chapter I think I've ever written. If you are reading this thank you for your time. Please comment! I love feedback . I hope you enjoy it. *****

Once his withdrawal symptoms came to an end ,close to sunrise, Luke slipped into a deep sleep that his body so desperately needed.
I wasn't sure what I would be faced with when he finally woke. There were many possibilities. He may be so depressed that he couldn't even stand to leave the bed. He may feel restless and need a distraction.  He may be starving and eat a weeks worth of food.   Worst case scenario he would wake up angry and never want to see me again. As much as that would hurt I had already began to make peace with it. I knew that getting him to this point was what was best for him and for the band. So even if that meant I'd have to quit my job and watch him succeed from a far. It would be worth it in the grand scheme of things.

I took the time to clean up the room, take a shower, and set out some clean clothes for Luke. At some point he was going to need a distraction that wasn't drugs or sex. . So I set a few things in place for him in case they were wanted.

I knew he needed sleep but I was growing restless wondering what was going to happen in the next 24 hours. I took the time to organize some stuff for the band and pay Ashton and Luke's bills to pass the time.

A: How's it going over there?

C: I think we are finally out of the woods with the withdrawal. He's in a deep sleep. Just bracing for what comes next

A: please know that no matter what happens nothing changes between us.  I am so grateful for you and the unselfish act you've given. I know this could go a lot of ways but no one else could have gotten him here. He only listens to you. Thank you.

C: you know you don't need to thank me. All I want is to see him thrive. He's so much more than he knows. I won't let him throw away his talent and his family for a substance.

A: I wish we would have met you a year earlier. Things could have went so differently. But here we are.. please call me if you need anything. Love you.

C: love you Ash. Get some sleep. It will all work out one way or another.

It was 3:00 in the afternoon when Luke started to move around in the bed. He tossed and turned for a few minutes trying to fall back to sleep. I sat curled up in the chair bracing myself for what might happen. It dawned on me that in the three months I had spent with Luke he had never really been fully sober. He was at all times at least slightly drunk. What if once he was fully himself he couldn't stand me. My heart pounded thinking about the possible rejection. I had never cared about anyone like I cared about Luke. He wasn't just my job anymore. He was my best friend, my every waking moment, and I, as selfish as it may seem needed him to still need me. I knew he was waking When he started to stretch.

He inhaled a deep breath. "CHERRY?!"

He sat straight up in a panic scanning the room.

"I'm here. " I said quietly without moving from my chair. His eyes landed on me and his breathing even out instantly. He put his arms out and I couldn't have gotten in the bed faster if I had wanted to.

"Fuck , I thought you had gone, I had this awful dream , you left. .. I ugh.. anyways...it was terrible" his voice was deep and groggy.

I buried my face in his chest and tried to calm the lump in my throat. He was awake and he didn't hate me. His first instinct was to find me. Although I had told myself I could accept it if he hated me I was lying. It would have tore me apart.

"I'm not going anywhere, unless you want me to go." I said with my face still buried in his chest trying to compose myself.

"Don't talk crazy." He put his thumb under my chin an lifted my head. "Whats wrong?"