Deviating from the Norm (A "Freaks and Geeks" Fanfic)

Chapter 20 - Old habits die hard

Kim knew I wasn't just going to bring the subject up in front of all our friends and she had been doing a fairly good job of avoiding me throughout the week when she was alone. Trying to get her on the phone was just as futile and I didn't even want to endure the craziness that would've ensued if I went to her house.

I had managed to figure out just where she was going off to during our shared third period, though. She would simply hang out in the girls restroom to smoke or talk with a few others from her bully troupe or, mainly, to avoid me.

I watched her walk through the door and I waited, looking for any previous occupants to leave or any potential new arrivals. The whole thing made me feel like some sort of creepy stalker (and I guess, to some extent, I was acting that way), but I needed to talk with her. I needed to know what was going on. Just allowing her to avoid me forever and not trying to do a damned thing about it wasn't going to help with either of those things. After five minutes of no activity from the restroom, I followed her in.

I took in a breath after I entered the door, not exactly sure what or who else I may see, but knowing I would have to turn right around and leave if someone made a scene. To my relief, Kim was alone in the room. She was sitting on the tall radiator with the window open behind her, lit cigarette in hand with a look on her face that came across as lost. Completely lost.

"Shit!" she blurted out when she saw me. "What the hell are you doing?"

I leaned against the wall and stared at her for a moment. "Well that's more than you've said to me all week. Care to continue?"

She blew out a puff of air wearily and rolled her eyes before completely diverting her gaze to one of the empty stalls next to her. "You should get out of here. This is the girls bathroom, you know?"

"Is this your whole plan? Ignore me until school is out... or forever?"

No response.

"I couldn't help but notice how you and Daniel are back together. So I was just, what, a rebound guy until he got his shit together? A placeholder? A one-night stand? Does he even know?"

"No!" Kim said frantically, jumping from her seat. "And you can't tell him... please."

I scoffed, truly pissed that that was what got a reaction out of her. "So you avoid me like the plague, treat me like I don't exist anymore and I'm supposed to, what, stand back and admire you two with a smile?"

I caught a look of empathy in her eyes as she spoke. "He's your friend too, isn't he? Don't hurt him like that."

"Hurt him? I'm honestly having a hard time giving a shit about him right now. You know he manipulates people to get what he wants. Ken already told me the punk club went over like lead balloon and I have no doubt he came by to flash those puppy dog eyes at you and patch things up as quickly as possible when he realized he fucked up. You deserve better than being someone's backup plan and you know it. I'll tell you what hurts, Kim- the fact that I care about you... a lot. It hurts because I thought that just maybe you were beginning to see that Friday night when-"

"Friday night was a mistake, Donovan, a huge mistake," she cut in, throwing her cigarette into the sink and dousing it with water.

It was as if she didn't even hear the fact that I had just put my heart on my sleeve.

"Kim- what? No, that's bullshit."

"No, it isn't."

She was facing me but looking down to the ground, avoiding eye contact again. I stepped closer to her, moving my hand to her face and placing my thumb and forefinger on her chin, gently pushing her head back up to draw her attention to me. If she truly meant what she was saying, I at least wanted to see if she would look me in the eyes when she said it. I watched her move her hand up to mine, but she sheepishly embraced it instead of removing it.