I love Dieter. [Dieter x Reader; I love yoo fanfic]

Part I: Schlafen

Everything was blurry except for him. Dieter stood in front of you, cheeks red from the snow melting on his warm skin. He was beautiful with his scruffy blonde hair and dazzling blue eyes; you couldn't keep your eyes off of him.

"I'm sorry." He spoke, voice muffled and harsher than usual. "I just don't feel the same way. You . . . you're nothing like her."

You opened your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. You wanted to reach out for his hand, trying reassure him that you don't like him — it's all a misunderstanding, but you're frozen in place.

"You're delusional. You have to wake up."

You want to beg him to stop, emotions amplifying inside of you exponentially, as the snow begins to fall faster and the wind threatens to suffocate you, but everything about you is still; you're forced to stand there and take the unfiltered truth from the kindest man you know.

"Wake up." He continues. "Wake up. Wake up . . . C'mon. Wake up."

— — — — — — — — — —

Eyes fluttering open, you see the real Dieter, who looks warm and inviting unlike the Dieter who rejected you moments ago, standing above you. Your senses adjust back to reality, met by the soft light of sundown and the quiet sound of the schools walls whistling in the wind.

"Hey, sleepyhead. You okay?" His voice came out of a gentle smile, as he put his hand on your head.

"I-" You start, having a hard time adjusting from the harshness of dream Dieter to the one standing next to you, but quickly become aware of the real world as his warm skin rests on top of your hair. "I am fine, I think. What time is it?"

He takes his hand off your head to check his watch, making you swallow the small part of you that now regretted asking. "Just an hour after judo practice finished."

"Shit." The sigh leaves your lungs slowly and heavily, the weight quickly replaced by the dark feeling of disappointment. "I'm sorry, I just . . . honestly, my sleep schedule is really messed up."

He lets a breathy, soft laugh escape his nose. "You don't have to apologize to me; besides, I've not had a good night sleep in months either, so I understand."

The bags under his eyes had been obvious since Shin-as rejected him, making his already glum face seem even sadder. So much about him had changed since that day. He quit the judo team. He lost so much weight. He barely even texted you anymore. Honestly, you were surprised to see him right in front of you, as he only existed as a passing blur, being protected and comforted by his friends, every time you crossed paths.

"I know what you're thinking." He continues, giving in to his usual awkward tick as he lifted his hand to rub the back of his neck, as if to protect a sensitive and fragile part of himself. "We . . . we haven't talked in awhile. I'm sorry about that. I really hope you don't think I've been doing it on purpose."

It had been weeks since your last text exchange, where he asked you to make sure everyone on the judo team knew he would miss them. You didn't blame him, though, as you understood what he was going through. When Shin-ae broke his heart, Dieter broke your heart. But, there was one big difference: since that day, you've seen him and Shin-ae together, eating with her and both of their friends. You, however, felt cast to the side, a disposable minor character in his life.

"I don't." The words you spoke held a darker truth than you wish they did. "Don't worry, I don't think you did it on purpose." You were just easily forgettable, easily ignored, easily pushed away. So easy, it didn't take any conscious thought.

He shifted on his feet, the tension in the room growing muggy and hot. You were always bad at hiding your emotions of your face, even if you liked to pretend differently; Dieter never had any problem discerning when you were upset.

"I'm . . . I'm glad." His words were more awkward now, feeling the weight of the conversation on his shoulders more clearly. "Still, I wanted to make it up to you."

"Oh?" A part of you felt bad, as you watched your transparent feelings hurt him, so you played along, eventually lifting an eyebrow as a goofy white flag.

"Yeah." He started to smile again and it was contagious, threatening to tug on the corners of your lips. "I want to treat you to dinner."

"Man, you must really be feeling guilty for ignoring me, huh?" It was a heavy statement, but said in jest, as you allowed your smile to grow completely. You really missed him; it was impossible to look in his eyes and stay angry.

"Well, yeah." He responded seriously at first, hoping you would understand that he also truly missed you. "Plus, we never got to celebrate your last judo match win."

With that, it all flooded back to you again — the cold stairs on your bare feet, the blood pumping through your veins, the ache in your heart as you saw Dieter confess to Shin-ae — all of that heartache starting with you excitedly running to tell him about your winning judo move, one he spent weeks teaching you. A part of you wished you never won.

"I'm taking interest, y'know?" You tried to keep the same soft air about you that you were able to conjure before. "Better be a big bowl of ramen."

"Whatever size you want; my treat." That was the first time you saw his full smile in months.