Finding Yourself : Fred Weasley

14

   The weekend is long and drawn out. I suppose that it didn't help that I didn't leave my bed most of the time. I only left to shower. I sat around and worked on another letter to my mom.
    I don't mention anything but my real parents in my letter. I ask her to send me some of my information. My birth certificate, my adoption papers, a walkthrough of how I was adopted, where I was adopted from, and a few other things like that.
    Once I finish the letter I start on some of my school work. And after a few hours, I have that done too. I move on to my letter to Lupin, which is much more difficult. I start off by asking him how he is and how things are going for him. I tell him about some of the small changes around the school, like Moody filling in his old position. And even though he probably already knows about the Tournament I still tell him a bit about it.
      Then I move on to asking for his help. I make sure to get my point across that he absolutely doesn't have to if he doesn't want to or if he is busy or anything and that it is fully his decision and it will be voluntarily. I don't disclose much about it. I just ask if he would be willing to help, and that is really it. I will save the rest for if he accepts. 
     Once I finish I am restlessly tired. If that makes any sense. It is like I am very tired but at the same time, I am very restless. It is very irritating. Especially when you are trying to go to sleep. I take off my glasses and set them on the table then lay down. I normally wear my contact lenses, but seeing how I didn't leave the dorm room I didn't see a point in it. I close my eyes and force myself to be still and sleep. 

    I woke up way too early for a Monday. And after about thirty minutes of trying to go back to sleep, I get up and get dressed. I put my hair up in a messy bun, wishing I could cut it, then slide my shoes on. I think about putting my contacts in, but I decide it is too early and there won't be anyone up to see me yet anyway, so I just slap on my glasses. 
    I grab the letters I wrote and walks out to the common room. It's still empty. Good. I walk out of the room and down the corridors and up some stairs. I go to the owlery.
    I walk inside the quiet room and make my way over to one of the small owls. I have a small fear of birds so I tend to try to avoid the larger ones. I take my letters out of my pocket and fold them up separately. 
    "Hey," I hear from a few feet behind me. I jump and quickly turn. Harry is standing in the doorway. His skin now it's normal colour and not the blue that the twins and Lee changed it to. Oh great. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," he says while walking in and over.
    "Hey," I say quietly, wanting to just leave without sending the letters. What is it and always running into him here? "You can use Hedwig," he says while lightly petting his snowy owl. "No thank you. I don't want to prevent you from sending or getting anything."
    "I don't have anyone here to send things to and get things from," he says making me feel bad for saying anything. "But you've been sending and getting letters," I say trying to help myself.
    "Okay, yea. I have one person," he says after a few seconds. I don't say anything. "But you can still borrow her. I can't use her right now." "Why not?" I ask both curious and confused.
    He doesn't say anything for a few seconds like he is thinking about what he wants to say. "I just can't," he finally says. I decide not to ask any more questions. "Okay, thank you," I say before gently putting my letter on Hedwig's leg.
    She gives a soft hoot before flying off. I watch where she disappeared, wishing I could leave like that too. I'm not sure if Harry and should talk about what happened or if we just ignore it forever. Right, I'm going to go out on a limb and make the decision.
    "I'm sorry about the twin's prank," I say while forcing myself to look at him and not my feet. "It's fine, it's their fault. Not yours. It was just a joke," he responds while turning lightly red. There is a small pause.
    "Harry, I like you, but just as friends," I say slowly. He lightly nods. "Yea. Same for you." I slightly smile at him. "I'm glad we have that cleared up then." He slightly smiles back and lightly nods. "Me too." I lightly wave. "I'll see you later Harry," I say before walking out.
    At breakfast that morning Cedric tried talking to me about what happened. I told him not to worry about it and everything is fine. Reno, strangely enough, seems very uninterested in the conversation and continues to quickly write in his notebook. I quickly changed the subject to my letters.
    I tell him how I plan to go and talk to Dumbledore soon. He offers to go with me but I tell him it's okay. He suggests that I take the twins or one of them. I laugh and tell him that even if I'm okay I'm still kinda pissed at them.
    I don't tell him that my problem is I don't know where Dumbledore's office is and I'm still not for sure what to ask him. I'll figure both things out. I don't know when. But I will. 

_____
I put a photo of her glasses up there in case any of you were curious about those.