I Wish I Were (boyxboy)

5

"I didn't know you were friends with Sam," Georgia said as we maneuvered our way through the crowd. Her back was to me as she led the way out.

"I'm really not. I just..." I paused, knowing full well I couldn't tell Georgia about throwing up, or hating crowds. "I went out onto the balcony and he was there, so we got to talking."

She nodded. "He seems nice." She turned to look at me, her smile glinting in the dim light.

"Yeah."

Soon, we got to the door. Before Georgia opened it, she grabbed her keys from her pocket and jingled them in my face. I leaned back from her as she laughed.

"I haven't been drinking. I'm 100 percent sober, just so you know."

"Okay." I wanted to tell her she wasn't acting sober, but I knew better than to question her. I needed a ride home and crawling back to Sam wasn't an option.

Georgia flashed a smile and reached for my hand, tangling our fingers together. Her hand was warm and soft, probably the exact opposite of mine.

"Let's go." She winked as she opened the door and pulled me through. My stomach dropped as I imagined being alone in Georgia's car with her. The thought chilled my body more than the cold wind.

The lights on Georgia's car flashed as she unlocked the doors. I pulled open the passenger door and all but collapsed onto the seat, realizing just how tired I was. If I'd actually had something to drink, I wouldn't have been so exhausted, but the weariness wore me down, especially as I imagined Wes and Ashley together. Talking with Sam had really made me forget about it, but now as I sat in silence waiting for Georgia to get in, I was replaying the scene in my head and it was making me sick.

Georgia got in and started the car, rubbing her hands together as the car came to life and warmed up. "Did you have fun, Charlie?" she asked, turning to look at me. I could barely make out her features, the only light in the car coming from the porch light.

"Yeah," I said with a nod. I ran a hand through my hair. "It was fun." But it wasn't. The only part that was fun was messing around with Sasha and talking to Sam which only slightly made up for the otherwise awfulness of the night. "What about you?" I asked, my eyebrows raising in question.

Georgia nodded, turning away from me as she put her hands on the steeling wheel. "It was okay, but all of my friends paired up with guys and I had no one to hang out with." Now she looked at me, her mouth twisted into a half smile.

"I'm sorry," I murmured, unable to meet her expectant gaze.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her bite her lip, her head shaking slightly as she finally put the car into drive.

She pulled out of the driveway and onto the street. "You don't say much, do you?"

"I just don't feel good," I lied, gazing out the window at the blank landscape.

She whipped her head toward me, eyes wide. "You're not going to throw up, are you? Do I need to pull over?"

I shook my head quickly, my hand reaching out for her arm. "No, no, not at all. I just have a headache. I'm okay."

"Good." Her eyes fell on my hand still touching her. I let my hand fall from her arm and barely graze her thigh before I pulled it back to my stomach. "I've had too many drunk people throw up in my car. I don't need you doing that too." She let out a short laugh.

We sat in silence for a while.

"You do remember where I live, right?" I asked as we neared the turn off for my street.

Georgia nodded. "Yeah... It's by the park, right?"

"Yep."

She made a right turn then slowed down as she approached my house. The only light on was from my brother's room. They hadn't even left the porch light on for me, not that I needed it.

I was about to open the door and just leave, but I made the mistake of looking at Georgia. Her eyes were dark with lust as she looked at me, and I just knew there was no getting out of this one.

"Charlie," she murmured, leaning across the seat toward me. Her eyes flickered from my eyes to my lips as she pressed her own lips together. "I really wanna kiss you right now."

I didn't want to, but even as my mind screamed at me to stop, to just get out of the damn car, I leaned towards her. She smiled, closing her eyes as her lips parted. I watched her lips until mine made contact with hers, just to make sure I wouldn't miss. I tried to close my eyes, tried to force myself to feel something, anything. But all I could feel were her soft lips as she tugged at my own. Her breath tasted funny and I was all too aware of everything around me. All I wanted was for her to get off of me, but my wish wasn't granted as she pressed closer and closer. Her hand went to my hair, another to my face. We kept kissing even as I mentally begged Georgia to stop. Finally, she leaned back from me, her eyes glittering with mischief.

"Wow," she breathed before going in for another kiss. But I was faster than her, twisting my neck so she was met with my cheek instead.

"I'm sorry," I muttered, leaning as far away from her as I could. My back pressed into the door handle.

"Wha-"

"I don't feel good, and I have to go." My words came out fast as I felt the stiff air of the car squeezing in around me, suffocating me, taking away my precious supply of air.

"Charlie-"

"I'm sorry." I opened the door and all but leapt out of the car. The cold air should have made me feel better, but it couldn't stop the turning of my stomach or cool my sweaty neck fast enough. Dizzy and disoriented, I tripped and fell to the soft grass of my own lawn. It was there on my hands and knees that I vomited again. I retched and retched, until there was nothing else left. I sat there for a while, shivering and sick to my stomach. I sat there until my brother's light turned off, until the moon sank below the horizon, until I was too numb to feel the cold anymore. Then, I picked myself up and walked into the house as the sky turned to grey.