Hazbin Hotel (and Helluva Boss) x Reader (Under Rewrite)

Valentino x [Autistic] [Female] Reader

For GabrielOwen6

Reader's P.O.V

Ah, Exterminations. A joyous, terrifying time for all the Hell-dwellers out there. It's a time of blood, tears, and plenty of guts. If you don't have a house or other such establishments in which you can hide, you're pretty much fucked. The Exterminators will come for your ass, and there's no coming back from that. It's fun for the whole family!

Now, I myself do have a place, fortunately. Unfortunately, this place in question is Porn Studios. You could guess what they manufacture based on the name. That place's owned by my boyfriend Valentino, and that is where he and his shitty entourage hang out during Exterminations. When I say that, I mean his Overlord friends.

He's only got two- thank God-, Vox and Velvet. Vox talks too much and Velvet is weirdly invasive of other people's personal space. If there's two types of people I loathe, it's people who can't shut up and people who can't get their hands off me. How Val got these terrible friends I'll never know. But here they are, and here I am. I'm stuck dealing with these idiots until Val has the common sense to kick them out.

They're supposed to be terrifying Overlords that strike horror into the hearts of those who hear their names. One would wonder how they even got those into positions when observing them as they stare at pictures of cats on Velvet's phone. They both gush over felines as Val and I sit as far away from them as possible, huddled together on the opposite end of the sofa.

I'm reading a novel about a crazy guy who thinks he's a brave and valiant knight and goes on a quest to purge the world of evil. It's a great read, and very funny. Val's got his arm on my shoulders and another around my waist. He's on his phone, casually scrolling through his messages. All of them are from his employees, and most are pretty suggestive. I know he's got his work and all, but those types of texts really irk me. I keep glancing over at the screen to make sure things don't get too explicit.

Velvet and Vox are chatting amongst themselves. They're pretty distracting, what with their loud voices and close proximity.

"I'm actually going to South End this winter. It's always warm there, so it would be a good spot to vacation while everyone else is dying of the cold", Velvet says casually, tapping on her phone screen.

"How much do trips cost?", Vox asks. "I might consider going too. The cold damages my electronic components and gives me really bad headaches."

"It's pretty cheap, far as I know. I got one for free because they got scared of me after I ate one of their employees."

"Huh. Maybe I should try that."

"South End? I heard the people there dress like cowboys and like inviting tourists to shoot-outs", Val says, looking up. Velvet nods excitedly. "Yes! They're absolutely bonkers! I can't wait!" She turns to me. "What do you think, (Y.N)? Would you go?"

I think for a second, then shake my head. She shrugs. "Yeah, it's not for everyone. What about you, Vox?"

"I mean, it's certainly worth a visit. Sounds... interesting."

She nods and shows him a picture on her phone. "They've got some cute gals down there too! Look at this one!" She grins, looking up at him. "Hot, isn't she?"

Vox's eyes go wide. "Holy fuck! You're right. She's smoking!"

She smirks. "Not as smoking as you, though", she coos. He looks up, face glowing. "H-huh?"

"Come on, don't act so clueless, Vox!", she giggles, throwing her phone aside and wrapping her arms around his neck. The phone lands screen-up beside me, displaying a blonde demoness with a cowboy hat and plaid shirt, half-unbuttoned to reveal her impossibly huge breasts.