Part 14 - Don't

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We had terms. Since the initial vocalization of them, those terms have been respected, for the most part. I believe that walking up the few steps towards the entrance of the firm was a violation of those terms, but I was going to testify negligence. Simply because I wanted to visit a law firm, and he happened to be working there, did not mean I was forcing our relationship to be intertwined with his work. In fact, quitting as his intern was illustrative of my utmost respect for them. My strides were slower. The absence of my usual anxiety and urge to exceed rendered my appearance to be ordinary, expected. None of the interns were present, and as I deeply inhale in needed solace, I make my way down the corridor towards the elevator. I am thankful to the universe for saving me from the personal, remotely professional intrusion that follows the herd of interns.The third floor was so familiar to me, and because of that familiarity, I felt a sense of nostalgia. It was ridiculous, really, because it's only been a week or so, but the nostalgic element to the fear, lust, and constant foreboding that happened within these corridors and inside his office was consistent with the nebulous veil that distorted the vision of my near future. I had so much on my mind, and Harry is one person in my life right now that was not agitating me, or pushing me too far to the edge unless I was asking for it in his bed. I stand in front of his door. Hesitant to knock, I look down at myself. The habit of wearing fitting t-shirts and tight jeans with worn sneakers was very indicative of how little I cared about my appearance anymore. This "reckless" attitude was surely a side effect of my depressed moods, constant frustration with life, and the cynically interpreted knowledge that people are capable of more than you'd think if you gave them the opportunity. And so if life is all about interpretations and perceptions of ideas, things, and other people, then, in the end, who could argue that one was right and the other was wrong? I couldn't, and to be frank, I was not very prepared to investigate that anomaly. Abruptly, the heavy, dark wooden door to his office is pulled open. The middle-aged woman I saw a few days ago walking to the firm with Harry stands before me in the doorway. We look at each other, her stoic expression changes from surprise to neutral in a matter of milliseconds. The growing confusion on mine faces her plain face, and she raises an eyebrow before letting her eyes follow up and down my body, viewing the attire I chose for the day. She huffs soundlessly and averts her eyes elsewhere, almost ridiculing me with no verbalization at all. I felt that I should be embarrassed, or somewhat ashamed by the way her eyes looked at me, but I was pleasantly surprised to feel...absolutely nothing. My steady, warm, and kind eyes watch her and she blinks at me, rudely beckoning me with a swift move of her head to move from her way. It was one of those days. Where you just...have had enough. "Am I going to move or are you?" Her flat voice curiously questions, clearly unmoved by my reluctance. "You can walk around me, right?" Behind her, I hear a chair glide across the polished wooden floor. Harry's figure clad in a white shirt and grey dress pants stands, revealing the entire length of his stature as he quickly walks around his desk. His face sported the same sternness, and he was observant, pausing when he hears the woman in front of me react. He didn't know what would come of this interaction, but by his mannerisms, I knew I shouldn't have responded to this woman the way I did. Or at least, he wasn't prepared for me to react this way. Her eyebrows raise and she suddenly begins to grin, but it's petrifying. The curvature of her thin, red lips is menacing, her wrinkled eyes and the pure black of her irises sends a chill up my spine. Her mouth parts as she curves her tongue in her mouth, and I'm surprised to hear her amusingly say, "Wow...fiery. I'm impressed. You look like a sweet little baby girl. I misjudged the sequence of events. What is your name, darling?" "Athena..." I reply somewhat bewildered by her change in demeanor. Did I sound more rude in my own head than in everyone else's? "Athena. You look quite exotic. Are you mixed? Hm, your mommy is American, your daddy is...hmm, Puerto Rican? Wait, no, no...Brazilian," she comically, eagerly inquires. Her index finger is raised, pointed to the ceiling as she plays a guessing game that appeared to be amusing only to her. My face is impressively steady. I thought I would turn into dust beneath her laser eyes, but there was very little apprehension present inside of me. I found myself admiring her, the way our interaction was progressing was amicable despite our initial standoff. I don't say anything, expecting that she had something to add. What was incredibly uncanny was that she was right. My father was of Brazilian origins. "I'm Akira Haruno," she introduces herself, the arm that was slung through an expensive, leather purse that complimented her entirely black attire was the dominant one, and she switches the purse around to extend that hand to me. Hesitantly, I raise an eyebrow and stared at the perfectly manicured hand. Eventually, I take the hand and she's pleased by the response to her gesture. We share a firm handshake before she sends me one last grin. Suddenly, she turns to Harry and ease-fully says, "Please give this beautiful girl my card. I think she'll know when to use it." Silent, Harry's pale green eyes examine her even as she turns away and walks around me. I turned to watch her walk down the corridor before blinking my eyes and sighing. Stepping into his office and shutting the door behind me, I mutter, "Who...was that..?""Akira Haruno. Probably the most successful woman in D.C," he explains flatly. "And she likes you." "I only met her two seconds ago and I was especially rude," I argue, surprised that the events transpired in the manner they just did. "Couldn't be because she likes rudeness. I mean, that would explain why she's around you." Harry sends me a look as he sits back down. "You're hilarious," he retorts dryly. "I know," I cheekily retort. "I'm liking this new you, but don't forget your manners," he teasingly replied, leaning back into the leather of his desk chair. "Hmmm," I hum slowly, making my way towards his desk, dropping my back onto the seat on the opposite side of him. Carefully, I take a seat next to him over the wooden desk, the piece of furniture creaking slightly. Hands in my lap, I simply stare at him, big eyes looking a little too mischievous, clearly with intent to agitate him. I grinned sweetly and continue to watch him with glimmering, brown, and warm eyes. If not more obvious, I batted my lashes a little bit, hoping that he'd stop looking down at his desk and that he would set down the pen in his hand.He's shuffling through papers, and suddenly he stops, his head lowered as he looks up at me through narrowed eyes. A curling lock of hair falls over his forehead and he squints a little. He's suspicious of my silence, and he just examines my face before sighing. "What, Athena?" He finally asks. "I've had a bad day." "Me too." "Sex?" He immediately blinks at me with surprise, leaning back fully and leveling his head with mine. "Later. Not here. You know how I get about my work --""Yes, I understand. Can I grab us food then? Eat lunch with me, please," I beg annoyingly, amusingly. "I take the please back, I'm assertive now. So we're eating lunch."He scoffs. "Okay," he agrees reluctantly, sighing to himself. He appeared agitated, but I knew my company was not as aggravating as he dramatically displays. I perk up, elated to be given the attention I wanted. If it wasn't obvious to him, I was pushed far enough by the urge to see him that I showed up at the firm. Otherwise, any chance of being questioned by the interns, particularly Jonas and Addison, would be desperately avoided. "Okay, I'll be right back. Indian from that place --?" I'm already standing to leave when he stops me. "Where are you going?" He's digging into the back pocket of his grey pants, taking his wallet out when I'm frozen by the inquiry. Thick eyebrows lowering, I murmur, "To get us...food?"He gives me a look, one that emphasizes my temporary inattention to details, courtesy of my girlish excitement to be eating lunch with him. I watch him go into his wallet and pull out the silver card he's very generous with when I'm involved. My face converts into a wary, glowering expression, and I find myself ashamed to be taking it. The sudden silence makes him look at me, a knowing glint in his eyes as he observantly points out, "Don't make that face, Athena. With the money on that card, you could buy three buildings in the Northwest region and there would still be left over." Gawking slightly at his blatant verbalization of his capital, I refrain from rolling my eyes when I state, "You've got to stop throwing your money around. I'm not a charity." "Philanthropy is a myth," he murmurs absentmindedly, having already chosen to return to his paperwork. Slightly agitated with his refusal to stop working even for the temporary moment to give me attention, card in my hand, I walk closer and take my seat right where it needed to be; on his lap. There was a moment where the shock overtook him, and he immediately leans back to put space in between us. He looks up at me, a pen in one hand, and the other going to grip my thigh over the fabric of my jeans. "Athena, what's wrong with you today? First, you're asking for some space. Now...you clearly --""Harry, it's not that hard. Just give me your undivided attention for at least three minutes so I can tell you about how absolutely awful and ridiculous the male species is," I rudely interrupt him, my swift remark making him go quiet. Taking a deep breath, Harry tosses his pen onto the desk. It lands, rolling over the surface for a moment. He reaches up to tug at a loose curl from my bed hair, messy updo, muttering, "What male species? Lions? Tigers? Wolves?" "Humans. And it's interesting that all three of the animals that popped into your head are carnivores," I smile as I point out, causing him to lean his head back, staring up at me with his chin closer to my face. Biting into my bottom lip, the taste of my own chapstick hitting my tastebuds, as I reach up to run my index finger across the right side of his jawline. He watches me curiously, the pale green of his eyes following my own brown ones. Proceeding, I begin to rant, elaborating on the most annoying of things. "I know that the STEM arena is already filled with egotistical men, who think that women can't formulate anything that requires intellectual depth and a basic understanding of arithmetic, but hear me out. I have boobs and I have a brain. Who knew the two could coexist?!" "Might I add an arse. A very nice, round one --" "Harry!" I laugh. Feigning innocence, he frowns and asks, "What?" I shake my head at him, knowing that he was just not finding my story compelling enough to respond with his own opinion. He must've already agreed with me by the way he didn't criticize my logic. Under his intense stare, I grew my usual, pink-cheeked self, and I sit up to lean over his own face just enough to press my lips onto his. He receives my kiss with enthusiasm, readily returning the sensual touch. But the kiss was sweet, and it was stopped before it could grow any sexier than it already was. We hadn't been very active lately, and I knew that my menstruating body was trying to steer me in the direction of anything relating to sex. My mind was filthy, but I didn't know if I had to blame my cycle, myself, or Harry. Possibly all three. "Alright, well since you shared, I have a question for you," he says, sitting up, our faces leveling. I nod my head, attentive to his every word. "I said to you before that my morals don't always align with my work. And that those times make me question why I became an attorney. I've met a lot of...interesting people in my line of work. So, my question to you is, is there a morality component to your love for physics?" I hum softly, thinking rapidly, but about so many different things that I couldn't answer him entirely until given a few moments. Raising an eyebrow, I place my hands over the sides of his neck, fingernails brushing against the soft skin there, wrists rubbing the collar of his white button up. My eye focuses on the beauty mark by his lips before I manage, "I think...that isn't a driving force for me. Physics...is useful, but it's not because I think it...it aligns with my morals. I do other things to keep a balance. Why did you become an attorney?" He clicks his tongue in thought, his hands at the bottom of my spine clasped now. His eyes avert to my shirt before he glances up at me again. "To be quite frank...I didn't know at first. Like I said, I liked philosophy, and I took up statistics because my father said philosophy will lead me nowhere. So I planned to be a teacher with my degree in statistics," he admits slowly, shrugging when I gape at him in surprise. "A teacher? Wow. Don't think I can imagine you teaching at any level, what with your impatience," I tease him. I see his lips curve faintly at my teasing. More seriously then, he continues. "But erm...I saw that I enjoyed feeling like I was being useful. Knowing that I had control in the sense that I could help the outcomes of someone's life that could either go very wrong or very well depending on the efficiency of one's help. Law school came into play...and I found I liked both areas of criminal and civil." My stomach turns with so much elation that I'm surprised I was still on his lap like this. Hearing about him and hearing him talk about his experiences, was something I was too fond of. It was strange hearing it now since it has been avoided for the past two and a half months we've known each other."You're so young, though, for such a successful lawyer. I don't know...it seems like you got really lucky and found something you're terribly good at," I tell him honestly, pausing to nervously bite the inside of my cheek. Sighing heavily, I then added, "I think I'm good at engineering physics. And I think...I'm good at law. But...I can't shake the feeling that these are things I'm just good at, and not things I want to actually do."He nods. "Well, for starters, I think you already tried the law route. Didn't quite work, right? 'Cause you started fucking me to make it more fun," he mocks, and I send him a playful glower. "And engineering physics is what you find fun as of right now. Akira...the woman that was just here, she works in those areas. Pharmaceuticals, technology, all of that...you name it. She's got some investments in those areas. Speaking of her, you heard her yourself, she wants to hear more from you. Maybe giving her a call is a good idea? Really test out this atrocious subject of yours.""Okay, but statistics, Harry. That's one hundred times more bland than physics. Just...by so much," I nearly cackled when I tease him, seeing how he almost rolls his eyes at my claims. "And this...Akira Haruno woman...how do you know her?" "She's a few years older than me. She was a grad student when I was an undergrad. I was more of the mentee and she was the mentor. We were both philosophy geeks, but she had an affinity for business, and I found my affinity for law. We're partners in many different investments. I know exactly the kind of person she is. Don't cross her, and she's loyal, determined, and reliable. Do cross her, and she's not very forgiving. But, that's saying a lot for someone in her line of work," he carefully explains. I nod slowly, taking in his depiction of her. He quickly adds, "She instantly liked you because she could tell you weren't rude. Rather...very determined to stand where you wanted.""Does she know? About us?" I ask quietly. He shakes his head. "No, not really. Although, you showing up here looking nothing like me, so the 'she's-a-relative' excuse is thrown out the window, and dressed the way you are, she wouldn't have a hard time piecing it together. I forgot to mention she's incredibly smart." Huffing, I murmur, "And so I should get in touch with her?" He nods, and then I press, "I can imagine that she already thinks I'm some college girl fucking a rich older man. What if she thinks you're my sugar daddy?" My voice is comical, and Harry doesn't find it amusing. "Oh, stop," he mutters disapprovingly. "I have rarely heard her tell me to give out her information to someone. She's a good person, and you can rely on her for a glowing recommendation. You know I'll be leaving one for you, too." "Ha...don't mention the sex, though. I think that would be pretty..." I joke, and this time he breaks out into an uncontrollable grin. "Alright, angel, this paperwork isn't going to fill out itself. And, you've been tasked with finding us lunch. Let me remind you, this was all on account of your volunteerism." "I have things to do myself. Like...atrocious physics. But, because I am so overly fond of you, I will get us Italian from that one place at the corner of Pinewood and 32nd street," I tell him happily, placing a kiss on his mouth once more, receiving it back. Our noses brush softly, and he looks at me one more time before groaning out a "up you go". I'm getting off his lap, moving swiftly with an interest to be back as soon as possible. Grabbing my bag off one of his chairs as he pulls himself closer to his desk, I search for my phone and see that I have several missed calls from my mother. Sighing, I groan to myself and call out to Harry that I will be back in a few. He hums lowly in response, already diving back into his work. I make my way to the door of his office. Pulling the wooden, heavy door open, I'm completely stripped of life and all the entertainment, serenity, and playfulness of the moments before. My skin flushes bright red, my ears ringing as my heart lodges itself in my throat. I swallow and gasp at the same time, confusing my hardening, drying throat. My mother stands in the doorway, and my feet suddenly feel heavy. Weighed down on, like somebody had cemented them to the floors. I could not move even if I wanted to, and oh, did I want to move. I wanted to run and never look back. Her cold eyes stare at me. She's unmoving, until her side suddenly moves, and her arm is raised in the air. I brace myself for the moment that her hand would come in contact with the pinked skin of my cheek, causing it to swell and bruise. Her quick hand was familiar to me, and I knew what the impact would feel like. But as I'm holding my breath, the hand never slaps against my face. Instead, a new, large, and heavy hand has gripped my mother's thinner forearm, squeezing it as so it does not slip. My mother's mouth falls agape. Axel had grabbed her just before her hand could come in contact with my face. From behind me, Harry's voice sternly demands, "Don't do that, Ms. Evans."Ripping her arm from Axel's grip, my mother's piercing stare follows Harry as he approaches behind me. She watches him almost with the intent to kill. I have never seen her more furious, and her voice has never resembled an acidic, purely repulsive substance like the way it did when she seethes, "You are fucking disgusting, Harry."Rather calmly, Harry questions, "Why? Because your daughter is more likable than you?" The comment was cruel and unwarranted, and I immediately turn around to send him a look, bravely interjecting, "That was an unnecessary thing to say, Harry." I turn to my mother, still utterly taken aback by her presence. "You didn't have to do this. Make a scene." In disbelief, she stares at me as I quietly and calmly adds, "You continue to demonstrate just how controlling and frankly crazy you are." Instantly, my mother haughtily snaps, "I'm not going to stand here and let you embarrass me like this, disrespect me like this. What the fuck do you think you're doing, sleeping with a man who is clearly out of options. Choosing to stick it into a younger woman because women of his age won't give it up for him." Harry is unfazed, neutral. He simply doesn't care...at all. No need to defend himself, or waste his breath. Not a single trace of anger, or any emotion in the details of his face, or in the muscles vulnerable to the display of emotion. It was terrifying. His beautiful green eyes gaze upon the women before him, and he's not even slightly afraid of what could transpire. I saw nothing in him in that moment, and it was concerning. He just observes the way my mother ridicules him out of spite. Axel, beside her, warns, "If you raise your hands again, I will escort you out."I swallow harshly and seethingly mutter to my mother, "If you haven't noticed, as you've deteriorated and clearly lost your fucking mind, I've been absoring all your shit...your emotional abuse. So...contrary to popular belief, I think I'm pretty familiar with people taking advantage of me. No need to try and defend me on this one, mother, it seems like defending me is a front for an ulterior motive." Harry, not keen on people hearing them, interrupts and flatly says, "If you two are going to argue, please do it inside my office, or leave. Feel free to take the office, however.""Oh shut up, you pathetic excuse for a man. You might be a good lawyer, but how fucking dare you defile my daughter and have the nerve to stand there with that smug look on your face," my mother accuses, her eyes squinted as she's completely repulsed by Harry's presence, and the audacity she seems to think he has. "Smug?" He questions, so softly that it amplifies the petrifying aura of his oddly sinister silence. "Quite frankly, if I was smug about sleeping with your daughter, that would be pretty immature, innit?" Huffing, she narrows her glare and I see the purity of the anger inside of her displayed on her face. Perfectly plucked eyebrows scrunched up and lowered, her nostrils flaring, her eyes so wide, and yet so infuriated. I breathe in deeply and strongly interject, "Okay. Let's be clear here. I am not a child. I can make decisions for myself."My mother snaps at me with little hesitation. "Athena, most of your life, I've made the decisions. Don't talk to me about making decisions when you've barely had to. The reason you're doing well, alive, healthy, is because of all the decisions I've made for you." Laughing bitterly, I shrug my shoulders and breathe out, "Oh my god, I give up." She continues, not bothering to acknowledge my defeat, my initial call for a surrender. "You make one decision, and here you are, behaving like a slut."A moment passes. I feel my heart tightens, my chest deflate. It felt like the whole world around me melted away, there was nothing of significance. Of importance. Harry watches the entire situation unfold in front of him, waiting for anything to happen. I bite my bottom lip, my eyes stinging, but I did not cry. I wasn't going to, anymore. There were no tears left, there was no emotion to induce the tears left. The pressure I felt squeezing around my head released the moment I finally and calmly say, "Okay." "What?" I turn to look at Axel. "Thank you, Axel." Ignoring my mother, I turn to look at Harry, giving him a look before deciding to walk out of the office. My mother calls for me behind me, keeping her steps in time with mine, enough to close in on the distance I purposefully put between us. "Athena." "What?" I harshly respond, jaw clenched and eyes blown wide when I turn my head to look at her, stopping my movements. We were right by the elevator. "So we're never going to talk? Is that what you want?" "You're fucking kidding, right? You want to talk? After your first reaction was to try and hit me? You're insane." Huffing, she remarks, "I've done that plenty of times. Athena, you honestly cannot believe this man. He's clearly using you, and look around you! There are men with guns around this firm! Do you think this is a safe place for you to just waltz right in? These people in this law firm are defending very bad individuals. If I knew about this, you wouldn't even be fifty miles within this damn place! Look what's happened these past weeks!"I shut my eyes momentarily, and I open them again. "I'm not afraid. Are you?" I ask her quietly, tilting my head slightly to look at her. "Athena...what is wrong with you?" "Nothing. This is the last time you humiliate me like this. Either you stay out of my life, or I leave, permanently." "And where would you go, hm?" She pushes. "That's not your concern anymore, is it? Do you want me to file a restraining order? Because I'm not a seventeen year-old girl, and I can successfully ensure our distance. How about one of Harry's security guards. You know the one that stopped you from hurting me? Yeah, that one. He's definitely heard Harry and I do a few things." She gasps. I press the elevator button for down. "You have changed," she whispers. "Don't think so. I think I'm finally just being me."

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