You leaned on Loki as you made your way to the door of the private room. Really, you shouldn't be out of bed after you'd just died. Loki realized that he was holding more of your weight than he had thought, more than just steadying you, but actually holding you up. Your wings actually dragged on the floor behind you as you walked. "Witchling, perhaps you should go back to bed and we'll bring the twins to you," Loki suggested. It was one of those suggestions that sugar coated an order.
You sighed. "Loki, I'm not an invalid," you tried to protest.
Your protests fell on deaf ears as the next instant you had been swept up into Loki's arms with a surprised squeak on your part. It was then you not only realized, but appreciated how much pain you were in from the dying and coming back as a valkyrie. And the giving birth thing. All of that sucked and Hela could have at least healed you the rest of the way when she gave you life again.
That wasn't fair and you knew it, but that didn't make you feel any less strongly about the situation. You should just be grateful that you were back among the living. And you knew it, but still, it would've been nice to heal you when she was bringing you back to life.
A moment later, Loki had you settled back on the bed, sitting against the pillows propped against the headboard. He'd carefully positioned your wings so they weren't squashed. He tucked the blankets around you up to your waist.
"Loki..." you told him with a desperate sort of pleading and a warning in your tone.
Loki pressed a kiss to your hair. "I know, darling," he said gently, understanding the emotions you hadn't spoken. "I know, but please, let me take care of you. You just died and I can't- I can't lose you again," he said and wrapped his arms around you, holding you as a couple of his tears fell onto your skin. He was trying to hold it back, though, so you just wrapped your arms around him.
"I'm here, Loki. I'm alive and stronger than ever. My magic's even back," you said and summoned a little ball of witch light to prove it. The second you had given birth, and come back from the dead, your magic was back. You'd desperately missed it these last months.
Loki nodded and pulled back a little, looking down at you with his emerald eyes. You saw the pain there and knew he really couldn't face the prospect of losing you. Even with the twins to care for now. He couldn't lose you. Not when he just got you back.
"Loki, I love you more than anything in the nine realms, but if you do not let me see my children, I will stab you," you informed him firmly. Your hormones were still out of whack and you hadn't gotten to see your children yet, which had been the purpose of you getting out of bed in the first place.
Loki chuckled and kissed you softly. "I expect nothing less, my feisty little valkyrie. You stay here, and I will go get them," he promised you warmly. You nodded and watched him leave, waiting impatiently in the bed in the healing wing. It wasn't nearly as comfortable as your own bed.
You found your hands picking at the fabric of the blanket and realized. Your mind was reeling and you finally realized what was causing the tightness in your chest, the hitch of your breathing. You were nervous to meet your children. What if they didn't like you? You expected they were perfect. They were Loki's children after all. You hoped they had all ten fingers and toes.
You had thought you knew them from hearing them speak to you for months, from their telepathy.
But you were still afraid that now that they were really here, they would somehow have grown to hate you. That you wouldn't meet their expectations.
That you would be a terrible mother.
You weren't ready to be a mother.
No amount of parenting books had prepared you for this moment.
And you were terrified.
Loki and Frigga both came into the room, each holding a bundle in their arms. You perked up, eager to meet your children. Loki beamed at you as he carefully handed his bundle over to you, the child bundled in a green blanket. "This is our son," Loki told you as he passed the child over to you. "Firstborn," he added, proudly. You looked over your son who looked like a tiny little Loki. His hair was the same black as his father's, though his eyes were crimson, even in Asgardian form, and his Jotun lines bled through.
He was still perfect.
You stroked his tiny cheek, his hair, and cuddled him close.
/Mama!/ you heard his voice in your mind and knew they that you needn't have been afraid. Of course your darlings were going to adore you.
/Hello, my baby/ you replied, glad to be able to talk to him in a way that he understood.
You realized that he was able to hold his own head up and his little arms moved to touch you, to grab your hair, though he didn't tug. You'd known that they were going to be bigger and more advanced than human children. It was still strange to see.
Frigga approached with your daughter and passed her into your arms. Frigga was ignoring your wings for now. She'd get the full story soon enough and you needed to see your children. She looked like a mini you with her identical hair, though she had Loki's emerald eyes. She held the Asgardian form better than her brother.
"What shall we name them, darling?" Loki asked you gently after you had cooed over your children and cuddled them and finally started to get to know them properly.
You grinned up at him with a smirk. "I thought we decided to go traditional," you teased.
He chuckled. "Anything for you, my love," he said warmly. He looked at his children and stroked his son's hair first. "Narvi," he said and you caught the telepathically said word as well, to teach the child his name. He stroked his daughter's hair next. "And Vali. Welcome to Asgard, welcome home and to the world, prince and princess," he said and kissed each of them on the forehead.
