A Betrayal of Faith ✔

TWENTY-FOUR: A Sick Feeling

The trio didn't stop until the valley and the Sanctum was far behind them. The sun had set a long time ago, casting shadows all around them. The forest that sat on the foothills of the mountains was thick and dense even in the winter, giving them plenty of hiding places in case Jonin and his group were still on the hunt for them.

Isiah doubted it after what he did to them. He hadn't been able to push the images of it from his head since it happened. He hadn't meant to do it, that was the honest truth, but it had been out of his control. All he'd been able to think about was the need to get out of the cave and find somewhere safe from Jonin and anyone else who might be after them.

He hadn't been in control of his own body. It was as though the stone had taken control of him and forced him down the tunnel. He hadn't wanted to go, especially not when the stone door had opened, but he hadn't been able to stop himself. The stone was a sinking weight in his pocket as he walked, a reminder of what he had done.

He should have left it behind at the Sanctum where it belonged. No one needed such power. It was far too dangerous to be in anyone's hands, even his. But it shouldn't have even been at the Sanctum. The followers of the Old Gods were peaceful, they didn't need something as dangerous as the stone he held.

The urge to pray to his Gods went ignored. It felt wrong to do so after what he'd done. He'd promised them and himself that he would never kill again and yet when it came down to it, he'd done it so easily. Just the thought of it made him feel sick to his stomach. How could he have done such a thing?

When the moon was high in the sky, Rina finally stopped. Isiah had trailed behind her and Nerin for most of the day, lost in his thoughts. The pair's ceaseless chatter had been one of the constant things in his day, that and the guilt. He did not doubt that they were talking about him, but he found that he didn't care all that much about what they thought of him anymore. The only opinions that mattered were those of the Gods and himself.

The worry in Rina's eyes still made him look away. "We can sleep here for a couple of hours," she said and dropped her bag on the grass. They stood in a small clearing, surrounded by the faint noises of the night birds. The moon was hidden behind the clouds, denying the land of even a little light. It didn't matter. Isiah's eyes had adjusted long ago.

While Nerin and Rina set up on one side of the clearing. Isiah moved to the opposite. It was too dangerous for him to be near them, especially with the stone so close by. He could throw it away, it would be so easy, but someone else could find it, someone a lot more violent than him.

"Isiah, you don't need to stay away from us, you know," Nerin called to him, his voice loud in the night. "We know you won't hurt us."

"Is that true?" he asked. He wasn't sure. He hadn't meant to hurt Jonin's people either, but he had anyway. If he couldn't even stop himself from doing that, how could he stop himself from hurting Nerin and Rina?

It was obvious that they were thinking the same thing. Neither of them said a word, but Rina gave him a small smile. They no longer trusted him not to hurt them and he couldn't blame him. He was meant to be peaceful, one of the most trusted people in Vishera, but he was far more violent than he had any right to be.

Watching them burn had disgusted him, but he couldn't stop, couldn't even close his eyes. The only thing that had obscured his vision at all had been his tears, which hadn't stopped flowing since the first person burned.

All he'd wanted was to be safe, not to see more people die. It was fine if Rina killed them. He hated seeing it, but at least it wasn't him. She didn't follow his Gods. Hers probably didn't care who she killed, as long as they deserved it. The thing was, Isiah wasn't sure if the people he'd killed had deserved it.