The aftermath

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Your POV aboard the Carrier
     Six stopped at the foot of my bed as he looked at me "I'm glad to see you're both alive and well" I touched the bandage on my face "not well and barely alive." He sighed "so I've heard, Doc's asked me to have sessions with you and Zach as a precaution. How does it feel being able to say you survived blowing yourself up?" I looked at my bandaged arms and legs "yeah, I guess that's cool. Hey six, did you tell my family that I'm still alive?" He nodded "that's why it took me so long getting down here, I called both your parents and gave them the good news." I nodded as I closed my eye worry starting to seep into my voice "Six? We're not getting discharged right? We're still rainbow operatives?" He nodded as he walked over putting his hand on my shoulder "of course, Doc expects you two to make a full recovery and be field ready." I sighed "We don't have a Viper anymore, it's in pieces in some fucking forest." He chuckled "Don't worry about that, I've already talked to the Marine leadership in Washington about getting you boys another viper. Just rest and make a proper recovery alright?" I nodded "thanks..." Eliza stood "I'm gonna get some sleep, you should too." I sighed before yawning "Yeah, you might be right." She chuckled before saying "Alright everyone, clear out. Let them get some rest after a long month, Harry, Monika take your time." Everyone slowly left before Harry spoke "I need to know what happened to you while you were there" Zach spoke first "It was... it was brutal. They'd starve us, make us play Russian roulette with empty pistols just to make us think we were gonna die, beat us, when they did feed us it'd be rotten. They'd hit us with acid, they made us fight other prisoners in pits, they'd leave us in boxes... soundproof boxes. It was horrible.... the silence.... it.... it just smothered everything..... they'd waterboard us.... anything they could think of to try to break us...." Monika gasped as Harry looked down "I'm sorry we didn't get you out sooner, we didn't have a positive ID you were there" I didn't react as Zach sighed "Yeah, we know how intelligence works." He looked at me "(F/N), you okay? You seem distracted" I shook my head clearing the memories from my head "Yeah, I'm uh.... I'm ok" he looked unconvinced as I closed my eyes "can we, can we continue this tomorrow?" He nodded as I tried to get comfortable. I heard doc off by one of the desks "I'll be here keeping an eye on your conditions while you sleep, Lera will do the same tomorrow while I sleep." I raised my hand and gave him a thumbs up "(F/N), we'll have to change your bandages tomorrow as well" I sighed before evening my breathing and falling asleep.
Doc's POV
     I looked at (F/n)'s form, before turning to my notes and writing in some things. After maybe an hour or two Eliza walked in "hey Gus, i hope I'm not intruding. I couldn't sleep" I waved her off "no no, come in." She walked over and sat down before looking at my notes "worried about his reaction? What're you worried about?" I looked at his form again "the burns, they aren't going to fade. They've been through a lot but only (F/N) has the marks to remind him. I'm worried he's going to hate himself because of them" she nodded slowly "I think.... once we get him over the mental aftermath, he'll be okay... I'm sure of it. He's too strong willed to let the enemy have that over him. He's never been a quitter from the time I've known him" I looked at her with an eyebrow cocked "you sound like you're in love" she looked at me "I don't know, I know I care but I wouldn't say I love him..." I nodded "I see, is something bothering you? You sound distracted" she sighed "It's Freyja, I'm confused. She avoided us for a month and then arrives before us after they get rescued and breaks up with him, putting more pain on him then he already has.... I don't know it just.... it pisses me off, I guess" I leaned back "is it anger over how she handled things or is it because of how it'd effect him?" She sighed "it's..... it's.... I guess it's how itd effect him" I looked over "I'm gonna be honest, I don't think them breaking up effected him that much. He was pretty much comatose when she came in and he didn't really react." She sighed before nodding "I guess he did seem really unresponsive when we were all here" I spoke "he's probably still coming to terms with being safe now, he went from being tortured and abused to a comfy bed with his friends nearby." She looked thoughtful "how can I help him?" I gave her a look "you don't want to help Zach?" She paused before replying "will all due respect to him, Zach has his net. He has Monika, Jordan Erik and the rest to help him. (F/N) doesn't, he's always been the more reserved of the two. He only has Me,  Elias and Marius that he's really close with and can help him." I paused thinking over her words holy shit she's right, I pretty much only see him with her, Elias and Marius "keep him doing things, keep him involved. I have no doubts that he'll make a quick recovery since most of the wounds are mental, once he gets food and muscle back he'll have time to think on everything he's been through... he'll probably fall into a depression, we have to be there for him once he gets there." She nodded with determination glinting in her eyes "thanks Gus, I'm gonna try to get some sleep. Let me know if I can help" I smiled as she left before returning to my notes.
The next morning
Your POV
     I erupted with a start as I breathed heavily clawing at my face before speaking coarsely "I'm up, I'm up, I promise I'm up..... don't hit me again.... I'm upI'mupI'mup..." I looked around and saw the sterile white room instead of the infested black abyss I'd grown so accustomed to seeing as I breathed deeply trying to calm down as I realized I'm not there anymore. Doc walked over to me "buddy? What's happening? You're remembering something? A flashback maybe?" As I finally calmed enough to speak I nodded my throat scratching "it felt... it felt so real.... like I was still there....." he nodded sadly "it'll be like that for a while, I can't promise it'll ever stop... I can, however, promise you'll have Eliza, Marius, Elias and I to help you through it" I looked up "Should we change my bandages now?" He sighed "I'll need an extra hand let me call Eliza and we'll do it." I nodded before looking at my hands seeing blood all over them before blinking a couple times and my hands went back to being clean. I sighed before muttering  "Fuckin' brain, never gives me a break" after a couple minutes of doc prepping everything the doors opened as Eliza came in I waved lightly before coughing "Hey Liz" she smiled faintly "Hey (N/n), what're you doing up this early?" I sighed "I..uh, I-I relived some stuff, it was.... it was pretty intense...." her smile vanished as she walked over "you're okay though right?" I nodded softly "just...just kinda exhausted." She nodded as doc rolled over with everything "Eliza, I need your help replacing his bandages, can you do it?" She nodded "just tell me what to do" I raised my hand "Can one of you take a picture and show me what my face looks like?" Eliza looked at doc before nodding "Yeah, I'll-I'll show you" I nodded as they started unwrapping the bandage I hissed as part of the bandage pulled off some skin as the dried blood acted like glue. After they got it all off Liz took a picture and then they started wrapping my head and neck again, any sense of freedom I had was gone now as the tape connected the end piece of the guass to itself, Liz moved infront of me and handed me her phone I stared at the picture in shock "that's.... that's my face?" Doc slowly nodded as he pointed to certain parts "these are the most likely to scar, you could get lucky and have minimal scarring." I stared at the picture "so.... I'm going to be scarred for the rest of my life.... and I'm useless for rainbow... great I'm jobless and... and..." Eliza spoke before I could finish "you've still got a job, Six told you that yesterday." I sat quietly as Eliza and Gus sat down and spoke and joked with me, it was nice. 15 minutes later, Six walked into the bay "Ah, (F/n), I'm glad to see you got a new bandage." I nodded as he asked "I've got a sheet for you to fill out, if you would?" I looked at him as I motioned for him to give it to me which he did swiftly.

I looked at the sheet reading everything before picking up the pencil "3, 3, 2, 1, 2 ,3 ,3" I looked at the box below the table before checking extremely difficult and handing it back to Six as I felt my bandages and he read the answers "it's bett...

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I looked at the sheet reading everything before picking up the pencil "3, 3, 2, 1, 2 ,3 ,3" I looked at the box below the table before checking extremely difficult and handing it back to Six as I felt my bandages and he read the answers "it's better than I expected, that's something. You answered these honestly correct?" I nodded as I took my hand off the bandage "no point in starting to lie now" he smiled "You've spent your life protecting your friends, it's time for us to protect you." I sighed "I'm fuckin' useless" Eliza gasped "bullshit" I lazily turned my head "Liz, I can't even get out of this bed, how can I be a tier 1 operator and pilot when I can't even walk, I'm useless" she stood "Bullshit, you aren't useless! You just survived getting tortured for a month, you survived getting blown up, you survived being on fire, you've helped our friend group grow into a family even though you stay removed, you've saved so many lives, you've done so much for everyone you meet. Laying on your ass for a week or two while we help you is not being useless! It's being smart! So shut up and co-operate!" We all day in shocked silence as she breathed heavily and her words sunk into my damaged soul I exhaled a shaky breathe "I'm sorry, I just... I feel so fucking useless.... I should be in a chopper doing missions not.... not sitting here doing fuck all." She nodded "And you will be, after you recover. Would you rather never fly again?" I shook my head no as she continued "then listen to doc and Harry and cooperate so you can get back into the air" I sighed again "you make it hard to be a risky idiot, if you weren't here I would've sweet talked Gus into helping me walk around the room" they all laughed as we sat there just chatting, catching up. Eliza sat next to me I looked over "thanks, for-uh, for being here for me.... during this whole... well this whole shit show... it means a lot" she smiled "don't worry about it, I just wish I could've gotten you out sooner." I cocked my only visible eyebrow "does that mean you wouldn't be here if it wasn't for it taking a month to extract us?" She laughed "god no, I'd still be here.... but the guilt might be lighter if we got you out sooner.... the shits heavy." I looked at the ceiling as doc spoke "do you blame anyone here for you being captured?" I shook my head "no, not really." He nodded as Harry spoke "Eliza, there's no need to feel guilt, it's not your fault and no one blames you for what happened. We all feel bad we didn't act sooner but command said we had to make sure we were hitting the right target, we had to wait for a window to open. There was nothing we could do until that window opened and you got us in before the window closed, you lead the mission that got them home and now you're helping him recover. Stop blaming yourself, it's no ones fault. I'm sure (F/N) would say getting shot down is just part of flying helicopters" I nodded "I've been down 3 or 4 times now, I'm sure Jäger's been downed as well" they all nodded as Eliza sighed "fine fine, I'll try to stop blaming myself" I smiled as I patted her elbow since that was as high as I could reach in my current position "thank you"

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