Love Is Synthetic

Please tell me why?

Why can't you love me as much as I love you? Why can't I be enough for you, no questions asked? But no, I am just one of so many other girls that are falling for you, just another girl to you. Can't you see that's what is hurting me? Can't you see that I am not like other girls? Don't you understand that I love you, and that I couldn't live without you? Why am I not good enough and why are you so blind?

I tell you "it's okay", but its crushing me on the inside. I won't let you see the tears that are threatening to spill over, because I won't let them hurt you, too. Instead, I'll let my heart break and deal with it when I can cry alone. When I know that crying is okay, when I know that the hollow aching, that I've been feeling since that very moment, is okay to embrace, when it’s okay to let it crush me. I won’t let you hurt just because I am. If hiding just how much it hurts for awhile will keep you from hurting, then I'll hide it. I'll hide it and be grateful.

I don't understand why you can't love me, why you can't just let me be happy with whom I would be happy to have. Why you can't let me be happy with you. Don't you understand that I love you, how much I would give to have a single "I love you." Come from your lips, just for me? Can't you understand that I can't live without you? That I won't live without you? I will always love you, no matter how you feel about me. I will always wish I could have been enough, I will always regret not telling you from the beginning, and, most of all, I will always wonder why.

Why couldn't you love me? Why wasn't I good enough? Why wasn't I the girl of your dreams, the one you've been waiting for? Why? Why? Why? There's a hundred ways to ask it, but there's only one way to answer it. The one answer you could never give me without lying. But, yet, I will always ask myself "Why?" before I go to sleep at night. Why couldn't you just tell me you loved me?