Silently Falling in Love: Again (Edited)

Chapter 3 - Blessings

Alex – February 1993

Christina was working late again tonight, so I spoke with my parents. I steadied my hands before picking up the phone to call them.

On the third ring my mom picked up, "Hello."

"Hi Mom, how are you?"

"Hi Alexander sweetheart, how are you?"

"I'm good. I was wondering if Dad can join us on the phone and I can talk to both of you together."

"Sure dear." She called for my Dad.

"Hi Amar beta, how are you?"

"Hi Dad, I'm good. How are you?"

"I'm great. I just did a round of golf this afternoon, and I beat Colin for the first time! But I'm sure you didn't call to hear about my golf game. What's on your mind, beta?"

I took in a deep breath before starting, "Mom, Dad, I'm planning on proposing to Christina for her birthday, but I want your blessings before I do."

There was a long pause before either of my parents spoke.

"Amar, you're so young. What's the rush? Is Christina pregnant?"

I choked at my father's bluntness, "No dad, she's not pregnant!"

"Your father's right, if she's not pregnant, what's the rush?" my mom added, which irritated me.

"Why shouldn't I marry her, I know she's the one. Don't you like Christina?"

"Alexander, we don't know, Christina, we've only met her handful of times. You are the one who needs to decide how much you like her and if she's right for you. Even if she's the right one, why do you want to rush into marriage? You just got out of school. Don't you want to establish your career and prove yourselves professionally before you embark on marriage? Marriage is a huge responsibility," my mom advised.

"Both of you were my age when you were married and look how well it turned out. You navigated your professional and personal lives at such a young age. Why don't you think Christina and I can do that?"

"Amar, things are different now. Your generation is taking longer to decide who to get married to and discussing more things before marriage. We didn't have that knowledge when we married, and we should have thought a little more about our philosophies on life."

"What's there to discuss? I'm in love with her and she's in love with me."

"Alexander, dear, marriage is hard work and how you view money, work, children, religion, etc. all matter in the success of a marriage."

"But you came from two different worlds. Dad, you came from a Sikh family in Punjab who left to study engineering. Mom, you grew up Catholic in an urban environment and an art major in London and the two of you met, fell in love and made it work and moved to America. If you can overcome those differences, how hard can it be for Christina and me? We're both American, we both attended M.I.T. She's a New Englander and I'm from California so we're from different geographic areas, but it's not that different."

"Alexander, it's not about geography, you can be from the same town and not be compatible. It's about how you want to live your life? You need to be in harmony with your philosophy of life. We're seeing a few of our friends who have older children getting divorced at much higher rates than we would have ever expected. It's devastating watching your children go through a divorce."

"Amar, we have four friends whose children are going through a divorce. It's harder when children involved. Do you and Christina want children?"

"We want to have children." I said. I'd never asked her, but I was sure the answer would be yes.