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☆
why are you pushing him away?
chan had leant in to kiss felix, and felix was going to kiss him back.
but he stopped, and he burst into tears. when chan tried to help, he shouted, told him to get out. of course, he did as felix told. he didn't want to hurt him, but it wasn't his fault.
it's mine. i'm the one that has hurt you all these years, the one that made you push away your friends and family, quit your job, become an absolute mess. and i'm sorry. i wish i could hold you, tell you everything would be alright, like i always would. but i lied back then; everything was not alright. i'm dead now.
so why can't you move on?
"i can't do it, hyunjin. i still love you so much. i miss kissing your face, seeing you everytime i open my eyes, going on cute little dates. heck, i was gonna marry you, hyun, but you left." he spoke to me a lot. of course, i could hear him loud and clear, but he could never hear my voice.
"you have to move on, lix. there's people out there who care about you and want to like after you. like changbin, jisung, even chan. i'm not asking you to forget about me, or to stop loving me, but you must do what is best for you. i will always love you, lee felix, in life and death. so please, love yourself."
felix sat up, his eyes wide as he stared straight at me.
"h-hyunjin?"
could he see me?
"hyun, is that you?" he asked between sobs.
i slowly nodded.
felix jumped up and threw his arms around me, but they only fell right through me.
"i don't think you can hug ghosts, lix." he laughed at my remark, wiping the tears from his eyes.
"how are you here?" he asked.
"i don't know." and i didn't. i had been there for over a year, and i had no answers. "i've been here since the moment i died, just watching you, i guess."
"wow, even as a ghost, you're a creep," he said with a smirk, and it was my turn to laugh at him.
and then, i had a thought.
"i think i know why i am here." i said bluntly. "you know in horror movies, if a ghost comes back, it normally has some unfinished business. maybe that's why i am here."
"do you think... it's because we never got married?"
i nodded. "i left my vows in the bottom draw of my night stand. maybe we should read them to each other."
felix nodded and rushed off to our bedroom, re-emerging with a folded sheet of paper and a small, blue dinosaur notepad.
i laughed. "isn't that the notepad you stole from the stationary shop when we first met?" i questioned, although i already knew the answer.
with a bright red face, felix nodded.
"hey jisung!" i waved, running over to him. finally, school had finished for the summer, and jisung and i had planned to go out for a meal and just have fun.
"yo hyunjin. i uh- forgot to say yesterday but i um..."
"what did you do jisung?" i asked bluntly.
"i may or may not have invited felix as well..."
"jisung! how could you do that to me?! oh my god, i can't breathe. what if he hates me? you're gonna help me right? and tell me what to say with like army hand signals and shit." i started making different poses with my arms, making myself look like a complete idiot.
"um hyunjin..." jisung pointed a finger behind me, trying to suppress his laughter. i turned my head to see felix behind me with a smile on his face.
"hi hyunjin," he said with a wink, before saying 'hi' to jisung.
my face was bright red as i stood straight up, brushing down my uniform and throwing a hand through my hair in an attempt to make myself look semi presentable.
"you ready hyunjin?" jisung asked, a huge smirk on his face. i was gonna kill him after that. was.
we walked and talked, having a laugh and just an all round good time. i was so happy. i had finally been able to hang out with jisung's friend, lee felix, my life long crush.
we had finally arrived in town. jisung needed to go get some things from the stationary shop.
a phone started ringing, and it turned out to be jisung's. "guys i gotta go help my mom with um... a thing... see you." and he ran off with no warning.
felix and i just laughed, shaking our heads at his dorkiness. "he's done this on purpose hasn't he?" felix questioned, making my face light up with pink.
our attention was then drawn to a crying kid being pulled away from a blue dinosaur notepad by his mother. we both looked at each other, and then back at the notepad.
"hey hyunjin, every played rock paper scissors steal?"
* i exceeded my word limit by like over a hundred words so i apologise for the sudden end to this chapter. <3
