The Summer I Met You

CHAPTER 24

Alexa's party is today. A mixture of emotions clouds my mind. I don't know what she has planned, but she's been more secretive than usual.

The rain has been coming down hard all morning. She texted me earlier that the party will be indoors now. Great. I'll feel trapped with no way to escape if things get — awkward.

I don't miss getting all dolled up for events and parties. Today I've decided that I'm in the mood to just be me. I throw on old skinny jeans and a maroon tank. It's simple, much easier than going out in Hollywood.

My phone vibrates in my back pocket as I grab my bag to leave. As if my mind didn't have enough things racing through it, Chase has to call. I wait for the pain, but it doesn't come. Contact with him is unavoidable, especially with the premier coming up.

"Hey."

A confidence I'm not expecting radiates through my voice.

"Hey, do you have a minute?"

The reality of it all comes crashing down like a ton of bricks. Hearing him over the phone was something I thought I'd prepared myself for. My knees tremble, and if I don't sit, I might fall over.

"Le — Lennox?"

I take a seat on the edge of my bed and grip the comforter tight. The last time I heard the hesitant tone in his voice was the day he broke it off with me. Chase is an actor, and I've spent enough time with him to know when he's acting and when he's being real. This is real, and I hate the effect it has on me.

"I'm sorry. I'm heading out in a few so I don't have much time to talk," I say.

"Oh."

The disappointment in his tone nearly kills me.

"Well then, I'll cut right to the chase."

He makes a drum noise like his pun was funny. I don't respond.

"I've decided that I'm coming out a few days early. I was kind of hoping that maybe —maybe — can we — I don't know, hang out as friends?"

I stare at the wall straight ahead. This is far from a good idea. I'll see him when I need to for Starlien events, but to hang out like we're friends again? I'm not sure I can handle that.

"I don't' know, Chase."

Chase blows out an even breath. "Will you — will you think about it?"

Does he not realize what this is doing to me? I was having a decent summer, and just started feeling whole again, even at the mention of his name. Now? It feels like he's slowly tearing my heart open repetitively.

"What's this all about anyway?" I ask.

I attempt to sound like his call isn't bothering me. I'm not sure how convincing it is.

"I just... I miss you. It's weird not having you here this summer."

That I understand. It feels like there's a big part of me missing not being in L.A. Being back here has been a huge adjustment, but I'm happy here. I have a new routine and I'm not dealing with the pressure to be perfect.

"I miss you guys too."

It's the truth. I miss the entire cast and my days with them. I thought admitting that would make me want to run back there, but it doesn't. He sighs like he's disappointed because I said, "you guys" instead of just "you".

"Will you think about it?"

I get to my feet. My knees have stopped feeling like Jell-O and I pace around the room.