"Stop! Stop being so clingy!" He shouted, Frustration flowed all throughout my body. I shook my head violently, no words could leave my mouth. I just wanted to scream at him, I trusted him.
"Y/n! Every time I'm with Cherry you always get so protective of me! Why? I've already told you, we're only friends...nothing else yet it seems like ya can't understand that," Pony spoke softly.
"Ponyboy...I'm sorry I-I didn't mean to get overprotective I just-" He cut me off
"You just don't trust me..Or you don't trust Cherry," He sighed & looked down at the ground. It was embarrassing, we were having an argument again & it was about Cherry, again. I tried my best to just let him be friends with her but it's gotten out of hand. I had confronted Pony a while back about it but I never really told him why I would get so iffy around her. Not only that but, we were arguing outside of his house, out in public. We had just came back from the drive-in & this is were it all had started.
"Why don't you trust me? Her? I know you're not exactly willing to trust people because of your past but that doesn't mean you have to act out like this. Why would you spit on her? & push her? Jesus Y/n", Pony shook his head. The only thing I could see was blurriness, tears slipped down my face. I turned around & bit my lip. He really didn't get it, did he?
"Guys.." We both faced the voice, Soda was standing at the door. I sighed & looked at Pony. I was going to try & drop this for now, he continued to ask questions & it was getting hard to ignore them. I could barely stand them either way.
"Y/n! Answer me! Please I just need an answer! For once, stop being so selfish & answer me!" He shouted. I flinched at his loud voice.
"Cherry didn't deserve that..It was embarrassing seeing you do that to her, let alone to a soc. Shes been nothing but nice to you & you're gonna treat her like that? Selfish," Pony stated.
"I'm done! Gosh Pony! You don't know one thing. I am not selfish! I'm trying so hard to trust you & I did but you know what's worse? Seeing your boyfriend always flirt with someone he used to like before! It's painful knowing that you could drop me just like that for someone who is actually worth something! Someone who is actually useful! You know nothing! I tried to be nice & I did trust you but every time you're with her...you seem so much happier. So much happier than you'll ever be with me. You can say that you only love me but, actions speak louder than words Pony. Yes, I did get jealous & anytime she's around I get insecure! She's beautiful, Pony! I see that & I try to convince myself that you're only friends but the way you guys are around each other speaks something else. I'm so tired of feeling this way, so I'm sorry for acting out on it!", I finally broke. By now I was spewing out warm tears. Sobs escaped my lips, my heart had shattered. I finally got it off my chest.
Pony just stood there, I could tell he was crying a bit. I tried looking over at Soda but my vision was too blurry. I wiped away my tears yet they still fell down my cheek.
"Y/n...I- I'm sorry I didn't know you felt that way" He croaked. I just shook my head. "Please..Y/n..I would never want to make you feel that way-"
"But you did..",I responded. I began to walk away, I had never felt so helpless before. So vulnerable.
"Y/n..,"He spoke out
"I'm done Pony..We can't continue this, it'll be way too toxic for the both of us. I hope that you realize you're true feelings for people. We're done." I sobbed & I began to walk home. I could tell he wanted to say something back but he couldn't. I could only hear his footsteps head towards his house; the door shutting & that was it. The end of us.
I had made my way home, I had gone straight to my room. This pain was too much to handle. It was incredible what one can make another feel. I wish I could have been more secure about us but that wouldn't have worked. Something would've gone wrong either way.
Hollowed, I let my body fall to my bed. My mind was blank, I wish I wasn't insecure but that's impossible when there's gorgeous people all around me. I hope he understands that he actually still liked her, he just convinced himself that he was in love with me. I winced at the thought, tears ran down my cheek but I didn't feel nothing. It all came out during the argument so I had just laid here. Lonely.
Slowly, I closed my eyes & I had fallen asleep. I had dreamt about Pony. He was with Cherry & they were so much happier than we were. God how I wished I was her. I woke up & shook my head, that's not how it could be. I can't long to be another human being to please another. I sighed & I threw myself back & tried my best to fall asleep again; I didn't though. I didn't sleep at all that night, I had school the morning & I was going to be so tired.
I got up in the morning & dressed. I looked decent despite my tired eyes. As I headed to school I'd seen him walking, carrying his books. His eyes were puffy & red, he was crying. The entire school day I had just seen him, all alone & heartbroken. I felt bad but I was a decision I had to make for the both of us.
Weeks had gone by & it wasn't getting any easier for me but I had seen it was for him. Little by little I'd seen he had gotten happier again. That made me happy, then I discovered that him & Cherry has began to talk. Great.
5 months after we had broken up he had gotten with Cherry. I knew they'd end up together, they were secretly meant for one another. I wasn't jealous or upset, I had seen it coming. Just seeing them at school wasn't the easiest, people accepted them together after a while, people were happy for them. They broke an unwritten rule.
"Y/n..Hey," I heard his voice, I turned around from my locker to see Pony standing there with my sweater.
"Hi.." I replied
"I came to give you your sweater, you left it at my house a while back. Thought you'd like it back," he smiled softly. I nodded & I took it from him.
"So how've you been?"
"Fine..seems like you're doing great"I smiled. He nodded & he was about to say something when she had came.
"Pony..hey Y/n" Cherry walked up to us, I waved & shut my locker.
"I have to get going now, bye" I walked away & looked immediately at the ground. I really needed to move on. I wasn't necessarily stuck on him, but I just needed to forget him entirely. That's what I planned to do somehow.
