Humor

Weird Story

I am proud of this...

It's honestly the weirdest thing I've ever come up with.

Actually I'm not proud of it I'm scared of it, this isn't really a joke... well kind of. Beware.

*EXPLICIT AND REALLY WEIRD*
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(Mans perspective)

I walked into the shop and immediately saw her. Her creamy pale glow. The way she seemed to have no cares in the world. No one could make her feel anything, but pain. At that moment I wanted to take her as mine. Order her right off the menu. Eat her out.

And so I did what I had to do, I called the waiter over and said could I have her please. Looking a little confused as to the fact that she was already with someone else, he said one second. That one second turned into ten minutes and his only explanation was that they were out of her tasty pale skin. None left to grind to a crisp, none left to taste in ecstasy.

And the wait was worth it because when he brought her over my mouth began to water in joy. I couldn't help but get a little wet.

From the spit of my watery mouth dripping down onto me. She was there for me to savor. All mine. Every last bit of her for me to taste, hold...
Sniff.

She was all mine. A little salty, just how I liked it.

I dug in, eating and swallowing. No chewing in between. It was all I could ever want. The smell alone could make my mouth water. I couldn't bare it anymore, there was something missing, something that would cover her and make this salvation even sweeter.

I called the waiter over again and simply said 9 words that I knew I could never regret. They made her even sweeter than it ever thought imaginable.

"Can I have some gravy for my mashed potatoes?"

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Well... that was...

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Isabella Duggan
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