Going to Stars Hollow and Bachelor Parties

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Jess' POV

I don't wanna go, but Luke is right, I do kind of owe him, and I guess I'll have to introduce Lory to Lizzy, eventually.

I pack up mine and Lory's stuff and head down to Stars Hollow. I make it to the diner as quick as I can, hoping to draw as little attention as possible. I walk into the diner and see Luke at the counter.

"I'm not paying for a motel, so we're staying with you," I state before heading up to the apartment.

After getting settled, I figured I couldn't spend the whole time here hiding in the apartment, so I packed Lory's diaper bag, and took a shower while she's taking a nap.

"Ah, you're here," I say when I see Luke sitting at the kitchen table.

"I do show up occasionally," he replies.

"The place looks the same. Is that your dinner?" I ask him.

"Couldn't book my usual table at Le Cirque," he replies.

"Right. I wasn't sure what I could eat," I say, opening the fridge.

"Eat what you like. Start with the expired stuff," he replies.

"Uh, maybe I'll go out," I say, as I walk over to pick up Lory.

"I'm hearing good buzz about a chow mein sandwich."

"What's on the playlist these days? I'm guessing Jethro Tull, or Jethro Tull."

"Just stay away from that," he says, jumping up and snatching up the stereo.

"What's with you?"

"Nevermind. Look, eat my food, use my shower. Just don't go poking around my stuff," he says.

"Mr. Sensitive," I reply, picking up Lory's diaper bag and heading to the door.

"Whatever, enjoy your evening," Luke says.

"Don't wait up," I reply.

--

I left Lory with Miss Patty because I wasn't ready to tell Liz and TJ, and of course I ended up having to go to TJ's bachelor party with Luke.

"Where have you been?" Luke asks when I walk up.

"Bathroom. It's best to use it before the puking starts," I reply.

"You left me hanging with the lords of Flatbush," Luke says.

"Sorry," I say, sitting at the table next to TJ's.

Adding a little extra distance from me and his lack of brain cells.

"Aren't you gonna sit?" I ask Luke when I still see him standing.

"He doesn't want to make a lap," TJ says.

"A lap is an illusion," his brother says.

Jesus Christ.

"What?" I ask.

"Don't get him started," Luke says.

"Hey, I wanna talk to you later," TJ says.

"I always enjoy a good palaver," I reply, pulling out my book.

"Huh?"

"We'll talk," I say to him.

When the guy across the table from me is distracted I swipe his beer and take a sip.

I spent the night ignoring the festivities and just reading at my table by myself until TJ finally had to intervene.

"Here's our boy. Having a good time?" TJ yells.

"Oh, I'm having a gay old time," I reply.

"You know you read so much I'm thinking of nicknaming you Reads," he says, scooting to the seat next to me.

"Good one," I say.

"Tough guy, huh?"

"What?" I ask, confused.

"Listen, your mom has this thought in her head she doesn't wanna share with you because she's afraid you wouldn't be into it."

"Oh, yeah?"

"She'd like you to walk her down the aisle. Usually it's the father that would do that, but he's worm food," TJ says.

"I knew that," I say, shifting in my seat.

"So, what do you say?" he asks.

"I don't think so."

"She really wants you to."

"I really don't want to."

"I'd like it, too," he replies.

"Oh, you too?"

"Yeah."

"I don't think so," I say.

"It's a really short aisle. It'll be over in a flash."

"Get Luke to do it," I reply.

"She wants you to do it," he repeats.

"Ah, I guess we're at a stalemate," I say, trying to go back to my book.

"I don't think we're at a stalemate," he replies.

"There're girls wallowing around in slimy dirt, and you're looking at me?" I ask.

"I don't want to tell your mom no," he says.

"Then I'll tell her," I state.

"I don't want you telling her either," he shoots back

"Want to pitch in for a telegram?" I say, looking at my book.

He slaps the book out of my hand, and I push him away.

We push each other and before it can get any further Luke comes in and pulls me away.

"Knock it off."

"Stop," I reply.

The bouncers come in and tell us our whole group is kicked out. One pulls Luke off me, and the other drags me out by my jacket, catching TJ around the waist on the way out the door.

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