Landslide

Fall 2016

Well, I've been 'fraid of changin'
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm gettin' older, too

Two months later he decided to crawl out from the rock he had been hiding under. Everyone was worried about him and no one mentioned Louis. They knew how much he hurt just from the sound of his name. He had avoided phone calls for months now. He couldn't let them hear him this broken. He had to get better. He needed to learn how to live without Louis. How would he ever be able to do that? It felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't function without Louis by his side.

He didn't know what to do with himself really. He didn't know who he was anymore. He had grown up in a boyband and Louis had always been by his side. It had been him and Louis from the start. They were all he ever known and to face life without Louis by his side scared him senseless.

But he wasn't a child anymore. He needed to stand on his own for once and figure out who he was and what he wanted in life. The only thing he knew with certainty was that he wanted to sing. He wanted to write songs and he wanted to perform them.

He also wanted Louis but he couldn't have him so he had to go for the second-best thing and start to sing again. He knew one thing he didn't want and that was their old management. He blamed them for everything.

So with new determination, he decided to start his own record label. He went looking for another management and found a better one he hoped. Now he just had to write songs.

He decided to go off the grid completely and headed to Jamaica to get some inspiration. He had so much that he needed to get off his chest in the only way he knew how. Writing songs would be therapeutic. He hoped it would help him move on, to help him grieve. He was so sad and angry.

He still hadn't heard from Louis and maybe it was for the best.