blithe.

chap v.

Joseph

Yes, I'm drunk as hell. And it's because I definitely regret leaving her behind. I don't know but I may sound selfish to say that I can't help but come back to her. Like I need her and I want her back. Seeing her happy without me hurts, because I let that happen when I could have just been brave for the consequences. I know, nobody can get stupider than me.

I am at this bar where me and Madie first met. I can't help but reminisce how we knew each other back then. I'm crying myself out and I know I truly deserve this. But for the last time, I want to hear Madie's voice, and maybe, ask her for another chance. For the very last time. If she really doesn't want, I guess it's really the end for us although I already ended it.

I reach for my phone in my pocket and hurriedly dialed Madie's number. I really hope she'll answer.

"M-made-l-line?"

I stutter upon speaking her name. It's been so long since I talked to her.

"Joseph?"

She replies, shock is evident in her voice. Oh how I missed hearing her voice. 

"I-I-I'm s-so s-sor-rry.."

I start to cry again. 

"W-what's wrong?"

"I-I'm s-sorry for everything. I just realized I really love you and I can't stand to lose you,"

Thinking about her giving me another chance seems too good to be true, but still, I'm down for anything just to prove her I really love her. I know it's too late to realize but I can lose my pride just to tell her how I feel.

I hear her sniff, which makes me feel so guilty. 

"W-what do y-you mean?"

"I-I don't know, I just made myself believe that you don't deserve me but now I think I can make myself better for you. Just give me one more chance, baby. Please?"

She's silent for a moment, and then I hear someone call her name. I think I know who it is. Then she hangs up. 

My hand slowly falls on the side of my face from my ear as my tears stream down continuously. So that's it, we're really over. I just still can't forgive myself for what I've done to her. She does not deserve any of this, no one does. 

The next thing I know, my phone rings, Madeline's name popping on my screen. I hastily wiped the tears on my face and brush my fingers through my hair. I swipe my phone to answer her. 

"Hi, Joseph." 

I try my hardest not to break down with the sweet sound of her voice. 

"H-hi, M-madie."

I manage to utter, my legs involuntarily taps the ground. 

"You don't have to say anything. Please let me talk." 

"Sure"

"I just wanna tell you that I'm grateful for every second we were together. I'm thankful for you for I have gained so much life lessons I never thought I needed. Thank you for making me realize how badly I can love someone, how many times I can forgive, how much patience I have in me, how weak I can be. Thank you for all those realizations that led me to one decision - to love myself even more. We had so much ups and downs and they were all wort it because in the end, I knew how to value myself. I knew what love really is. I was able to give you chances a normal person in right mind can't spare, but I'm glad I did. One is enough, Two are many, Three are poisons that kill a person. Joseph, I'm already okay. I hope you will be too, I'm praying for that. If you're thinking that I will still give this another shot, you'll just have to dream about it. Too bad you woke me up from this nightmare. Hopefully, after this, you won't bother to approach me anymore as if nothing ever happened. I'm not gonna lie, I had this urge to tell you that I want you back as well, but I've come to my senses, thankfully. This time, I must choose myself over you. I'm done, Joseph. I hope you find your own happiness and may you learn from this experience too. Thank you."

She ends the call. 

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DISCLAIMER: Characters and setting are completely fictional. This short story is dedicated to my best friend Krystal Estrada. The plot of this story has resemblance on her life, yet not literally. The characters' traits are not actually the same as Krystal's and her ex-MU's. This story is just an analogy, so don't take this seriously. 

Krystal is the true definition of Blithe; She is cheerful, optimistic, easily forgives, loves deeply, and rarely gets mad. She fell in love to this guy she met and this guy took advantage of her kindness, pretty much aware that Krystal will forgive her always. She have him too many chances, giving it all to him (but not actually her v card lol, just an analogy to emphasize the entirety). Then, she finally came back to her senses after 7 times of letting him come back. 

I have no idea what was the real POV of the guy, I just made it up here. If Krystal's lucky enough though, hopefully, that guy resembles my character Joseph's mindset.