Aromantic

Feeling Different

I'm someone who blends into a crowd. I've always lived my life trying to reach what's expected of me. I do clubs at school, I get good grades, I have lots of friends, I plan on going to college. But none of that is particularly different. I'm just going with the flow.

So saying that I'm aromantic just feels so weird compared to everything else in my life. As someone who is incredibly non-confrontational, knowing that there exists discourse over my identity is unsettling. 'Aromantic' is not something typical of a person, and is probably the opposite of what people want for me.

I've always wondered what "the biggest challenge" I've overcome would be. College essays ask this question a lot, and as someone who has lived a comfortable life so far, I don't think "figuring out what to have for lunch" would be much of an answer. I've thought about it, and I legitimately think that "learning to be aromantic" would be my answer. 

Because aromanticism comes in stages. 

There's the denial. "Oh, I'm just young." "Maybe I do like this person, but it's just not as exciting as I thought it would be." "Other people pick and choose their crushes, right?" "The one is out there somewhere."

There's the realization. "That's what that was?" 

Some people might stop there. Others might go to the bargaining and anger (like me). "I should try dating anyways." "Why am I different?" 

Aromanticism is hard. People question me all the time. I question myself all the time. I always come out with the same answer, but the questioning's still there. It's an instinctive reaction ingrained by society. By that romance-ridden society. 

I'm not the best at dealing with being different, but I'm so glad to have the community at my back. I'm so glad that I can go online and find so many resources and posts and stories from people in similar situations as me. It reminds me that I'm not so different, after all, and that I'm not alone in fighting. 

Even though it's hard sometimes, I know other people have my back, and it makes me happy to be here. I am aromantic, and I'm not the only one.

a/n: Wow this story has gotten a whole lot more reads than I thought it'd get. Just goes to show how big our community is. I love y'all (no romo).