Story of Aaliyah - TMR

Chapter 6 - I don't have time to fall apart

Sudden change in ones life is known as trauma, it is when you have gone through something that physical and mentally destorys who you are. Maybe that's the point. All that pain, fear, and the all around pain of trauma. Maybe going through all of that is what keeps us moving forward. It's what pushes us. Maybe we are meant to change and adopt afterall.  I just don't have the time to fall apart. I sat in the middle of the road looking straight up at the clouds moving over head. Seeing the different shapes they took on made my life feel simple for the momment being. It wasn't until Nate's sobbing finally came to a stop. The boy had been crying ever since Newt flew off which had to have been hours ago. Hours we just sat here in this very spot. 

Nate's eyes were bloodshot and puffy I reached over going to wipe them with the edge of my shirt when he jerked away from me. I let out a sigh knowing I hadn't even shed a tear. I just don't have the time to fall apart. I stood up pulling Nate to his feet as well. "We have to move. We have to get to shelter before night fall. We have to eat today." I stated all of this more for myself as I dragged Nate along with me. Nate began crying again and trying to fight lose from my grasp. "NO! We can't leave!! What if he changes his mind! Comes back!" 

This time I stop and turn to look Nate in the eyes. "Newt is not coming back. He is gone. He is going to save the world. He is safe and he would want you to be safe as well." I took in a breath as I again I wasn't sure if these words were meant for Nate or me. "Newt wouldn't want you to die in the street. Hungry as Cranks destoryed you." I spit the words out hating how the word Crank sounded the most. "Nate you will live a long life, and when you die it will be with a fully belly and in your bed." I Said as I gave him a harsh tug as we began walking again to my surpise my small speech worked. Nate didn't cry anymore and kept close to me. 

It was almost night fall and we had only found a few can goods and no luck with shelter yet. We lurked along side the buildings in hopes that no cranks would see us. I smiled seeing a home that's front door was left open. Finally one we could get inside. I went to race forward when the whole street was lit up with a bright glow of car headlights. I spun around pulling Nate behind me as I faced the vehicle head on. It came to a stop and I heard a car door open but couldn't see past the blinding lights. I kept telling myself it isn't a crank because they were driving but my gut still twisted into nots. 

"Hello?!" It was a women's voice that called out to us. My heart skipped a beat and I squeezed Nate's arm. "Hello!" I Shouted back to show that we weren't cranks ourselves. Suddenly another door opened and  a figured walked infront of the truck to show their face. This one was a male who looked old with grey hair. "Hurry along now, We have to hurry back before those things start coming out." Nate and I rushed forward as we all piled into the truck. Nate sat very close to me keeping ahold of my hand as we both faced our rescures from the backseat. The women was just as old and her grey locks were curled. "Names Beverly and this is my husband Frank." I smiled at the old fashion names. "I'm Aaliyah, this is..." I went to say my best friends brother but my throat caught. "I'm Nate." He answered for me in a sassy pre-teenager way but I was greatful. "W-where are we going?" I whispered and Frank smiled at me. "To the safe zone." 

We drove for what felt like forever but their clock in their dash told me it had only been an hour. Beverly would occaonally hum a tune and Frank would pat his leg to it. Neither of us talked much. They had asked what were doing and when we told them how we had been surving they were shocked. Not as shocked as we were to hear about the safe zone. They told us how they had plently of food, showers and enough spaces to sleep. I looked out my window at their safe zone as we approached. "Never would of thought to go to a mall." I stated as we pulled close to the loading docks. "It was the first place we headed. We weren't alone. They have set up a nice rescue center here and we have everything we would need." Frank said smiling to Beverly who said, "We only go out to scout for more people needing rescue. Thank goodness we do." She gave me a warm smile and I nodded my head as Nate and I got out of the truck together. I looked around wanting for cranks to come running but sighed in relief when I didn't see any. 

Frank knocked on the door and a very skinny man opened it letting us in. "Welcome." He said with a dry edge to his voice. Everything looked very dark and erie as we slowly walked through the back end of the Mall where all the boxes are stored. Nate clung to my arm as we walked. "We sealed up all the doors besides these to make sure none of those bloody cranks get in." The skinny guy said as he lit up a ciggerate inside the mall. Something about him made me on edge. Once we walked through the last set of doors I was almost blinded by the light change. Everything was so bright and lit up inside the main area. I looked around to see hundred of people walking around. "Whoa." Nate whispered just as shocked as I was to see how many people there was. It was odd to think just hours ago we were eating out of cold cans and sneaking through the streets just to save our lives. I pulled Nate closer scared to lose him in the crowds. "If you head that way sunny you will find the food cort we are headed to sleeping area." Beverly called as she waved at us before the crowd of people blocked our view of them.

As we walked I heard people talking about annoying it was to be stuffed up in here, and when could they come home. Everyone was so clean and unharmed that Nate and I looked completely out of place. Several people jumped seeing us and moved out of our way. Once get got to the food court and got some real warm food it was pretty easy to guess none of these people have even seen a crank let alone up close. Nate finished scarfing his food before I could. "They have no idea." He said I looked up at him then sighed. "Let's just enjoy it while we are here." I said back knowing that this small paradise can't last forever. Nate only nodded in return as he finished off his drink. We walked together aimlessly following the group. "Miss.... He can't be in this line." A lady tapped me on the shoulder I shot her a nasty look. Before I could ask she finished her statement. "This is the line for the women's showers. Men's line is over there." Nate and I both leaned to see where she pointed. 

The thought of seperating sounded awful but Nate gave me a reasuring smile before racing off to get into line. I looked back to my line as I got closer to the doors. The last shower I had was with Nate and Newt. Fully clothed just laughing because of how amazing it was to feel running water again. These people looked like they have showered every day since the outbreak. I hated them. I hated them more and more I thought once I finally was inside. I picked an empty stall walked inside closing the curtin leaving me completely alone. The water hit me along with all the emotions of the day. I felt my chest get tight as I began to sob. I fell down to the floor and curled into a ball as the water ran over my body. I laid there sobbing as every past memeory hit me hard but most of all the ones of Newt. I tried to burn an image of him into my brain... What if I forget how he looks. More sobs until I couldn't breath. I started to settle down as I just laid there against the titled floors watching the water spin down the drain along with my emotions. I softly whispered, "Happy Birthday." Sudden change in ones life is known as trauma, it is when you have gone through something that physical and mentally destorys who you are. Maybe that's the point. All that damage, fear, and the all around pain of trauma. Maybe going through all of that is what keeps us moving forward. It's what pushes us. Maybe we are meant to change and adopt afterall.  I just don't have the time to fall apart.