When Sarah falls pregnant in 2010, the height of her career. How will she deal with the struggles of motherhood and being an actress?
Any photos used as part of this story do not belong to me.
Today is my first ultrasound. I'm going to get to see my baby. I'm 12 weeks pregnant. I have a tiny bump, to people who don't know they would just think I'm bloated. But to me it's the cutest thing ever, my little baby is growing. Ever since I found out I was pregnant, I've been taking a picture every week to see the progress and how much my belly grows, it's so cute to look back, even in this early stage of the pregnancy. This is what my belly looks like right now:
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Adorable, right?
I drive to the doctors office, this time I have no nerves in me at all, only excitement to see my beautiful baby for the first time. I've not been throwing up so much now, which is a good sign, my headaches and back aches still come, but I've been told they'll only get worse, especially my back pain. My cravings are getting crazier and stronger as the weeks go on, which I've also been told. Amanda told me as soon as the second trimester hits pregnancy cravings get so bizarre, I'm ready for them though, anything my baby throws at me hopefully I'll be ready for.
I lay down on the little bed they have in the doctors office, getting ready for Doctor Barnes to set up his equipment. "Okay, Miss. Paulson, lift your shirt just above your belly and unzip your pants so we can see where the baby is." I follow his commands, smiling. The excitement gets bigger each second. He smiles back at me, "this is a very special moment for most mothers, I see you're even starting to show." He points out, which makes me happier. "You can start to tell people at around this point, you'll be scheduled for more regular check ups the later into the pregnancy you get, from now your symptoms might worsen, but the throwing up might lessen. Your belly will start growing like crazy from now and you'll get some crazy cravings. Just embrace it all."
"I will. I'm so excited to see the baby!" I say, I'm smiling so big I must look like a freak.
"Do you have a partner present, Miss.Paulson?" He asks me, my smile falls a little.
"Oh, no, I don't. I'm planning on raising the baby by myself." I say, confidently.
Who cares if people judge me? It's 2010, a woman can raise a baby by herself if she wants, I shouldn't be judged!
"That happens quite a lot, good for you!" He tells me, I really like doctor Barnes. He seems to get me. "Ready to see the baby?"
"More ready than I've ever been for anything in my life."
He puts the cold gel on my stomach, making me shiver a bit, then places the wand on my stomach, rolling it over and looking at the screen to locate my baby. "This is your baby." He says, pointing to a little grey blob on the screen, my breath is taken away and I smile even wider than before. "This is the head." He says, looking carefully and pointing out things as he goes, he also takes a few snapshots so I can keep them.
