My unsent poems

unhappy

every smile my mouth formed
because of your presence
has been ripped off
by every step you took leaving

and every smile that was ripped off of me
has never found its way back
and it never will
the happiness that's born within your company
will never call me back
it chose you
and left me
They always do

I thought happiness was you
Years forward I find myself smiling for others now
Now every smile my mouth forms
belongs to someone else
And when they leave
I'll be in search of another
This constant journey
At least I know
You were never happiness
Happiness is everywhere
Happiness is objects
Happiness is people
Happiness is everything
Everything but me

And when all objects melt
And when all people leave
I'll be alone
No one to smile to
Nothing to smile about
what I would give to be self running
instead I'm always craving for a source
When it's been sitting in front of the mirror
my whole fucking life

I blamed you for stealing my smile away
I blame the people that leave me and take my happiness with them
I'll forever blame myself for blaming others

that's what unhappy people do