Bloodstained (Thorin x OC)

Nightmares

Thorin, Balin, and Dwalin were the first ones to take watch, and soon wished they weren't. Those who had fallen asleep tossed and turned, whimpering and occasionally crying out into the night. It made their hearts clench, knowing that nothing could be done about it. The company needed to sleep for once, and that meant sleeping through the nightmares that the forest brought upon them. After about an hour, most of them had quieted down, and began to sleep slightly better, but Agarwaen was just beginning to mumble in her sleep. Thorin heard her gasp and cry, and tried to ignore it.

"Blood.....blood...there's so much blood." She murmured. "No...I'm sorry....I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." He looked down at where he knew she laid, and though he could not see her, he could very easily imagine her face, contorted in fear and distress. "Stay awake...please....so much blood....blood everywhere....don't leave me..." Thorin gritted his teeth. Whereas most of the nightmares he'd had to listen to were of monsters or a dragon, this one held meaning. Almost as if it was a memory. It reminded him of the nightmares he had every night for months after the battle of Azanulbizar. He saw the death of both his grandfather and his little brother over and over, and it left him broken for a long time. "I'm sorry." She cried softly, her voice broken and weak.

"Wake up." Thorin leaned over and shook her.

"Thorin, what are you doing? She needs to sleep." Balin said, sounding heartbroken as well.

"I cannot listen to this anymore. Wake up." He shook her harder. She gasped as she sat bolt upright, staring down at her hands in the dark. Sweat rolled down her back and she tried to calm her breathing, but she couldn't see, which only frightened her more.

"Belegurion..." She muttered, "All the blood... He's gone..."

"It's alright, you were dreaming." Thorin assured her. "You're awake now."

"But....oh, Iluvitar....the blood." She swallowed hard and tried wiping the tears from her face.

"This forest...It plagues our sleeping minds."

"Was I talking in my sleep? I'm so sorry." New fear wracked her body. She was afraid that he'd heard too much. She couldn't tell them what she did. That she killed her own betrothed. Most of all, she wished that she hadn't tried to save the dwarves. If she could go back and do it again, she would have turned her back on them because then it meant that everything would have been okay and she could have gotten married and lived a normal life. She couldn't tell them that. It would make her no better than any other elf. That's why she hid the fact that she was there when the dragon attacked.

"A little, don't apologize. I just...I couldn't let it go on. Not when it sounded like someone important to you died." She looked down at her hands again, still seeing images of her hands coated in blood. She took a deep breath and laid back down.

"The forest never used to be like this. It was brighter, more full of life. I...haven't had that nightmare in years."

"It's uprooting everything it would seem."

"Will you all be okay? With us nearing the mountain and all? Dreams can be powerful, and dreams of dragonfire..."

"Only us three were there that day." Thorin said.

"And we will not be so easily swayed by dreams." Dwalin spoke up.

"Then you are strong willed." She said quietly. A few more minutes of silence went by.

"The worst part of this darkness is that you don't just see your worst memories when you close your eyes. You can't escape them." Her voice was quiet, and she wasn't sure anyone else had even heard her, when she felt Thorin rest his hand atop hers, to offer what assurance he could. He knew first hand what it was like to see your loved ones die every night and have no one to comfort you. Dis grieved in her own way, and Thorin was left alone.