Fire and Ice

Chapter 37

~KEVIN/KRIUS~

I know I am behaving like an asshole, but what can I do? When I read that page, I was furious.

Not the furious that normal people are but the one where my ice started spreading under me. That's what my curse is, I can never feel the fiery emotions while she is denied peace.

This is what we have become, she is burning hot and I am freezing cold, when we come together we are separated by natural laws, our unison can never happen..

I am sick of lies and the way she hides them from me. I might not be the truth-seeker that she is but I know when she is doing something like this on purpose.

What can I do? I am still upset about this.

I do feel guilty though, I shouldn't have behaved like the way I did earlier today. She had fallen silent after I gave her the stern face, she might have thought, I am damn sure, I want her imprisoned. Oh Merlita save me! I have yet again hurt her.

I think she has already punished me for not telling her about my "memory returns", in advance. Karma baby Krius Karma. The Earth is round. I hid one truth; she hid everything about her problems.

I pull that paper out of my pocket again, and start reading it.

"I hate him, I really do. What did I do that made him so heartless? I never hurt his ego, nor did I ever mean any harm to him even when it's known that I am much more powerful than him. Darren doesn't deserve to be called my father. When I was a kid he tried to poison me, it was Guide Rector because of whom I am still alive. Ever since that happened Guide has been feeding me small amounts of poison everyday, making my body immune to it.

Darren has always meant harm but this is not acceptable. His son is supposed to treat me like his sister. But since he is Darren's illegitimate son, he isn't my brother, of course what could I expect from someone who shares Darren's blood. I hate both of them.

Everyone thinks he and I are on good terms, if only.

Shylock tried to.... he transformed into Krius and for once even I fell for it, I really thought it was him. I ran to hug him, and then he clasped his arms around me and wouldn't leave me.

I was tricked and I was standing there helpless because I couldn't kill him for even trying something like this. Only a star with no ethics and morals can kill its own kind.

I couldn't harm him that time and right then I felt something at my back, he had stabbed me, I was bleeding and then I realized that the dagger wasn't a simple one.

I concentrated on my heat and energy to drive him away, I focused only on my fire and there it came like a ball of fire, like the sun and Shylock released me.

My mortal father saw me lying on the floor with blood oozing out of me, he was frantic, but then he helped me. I told him about my truth while he tended to my wound."

Yes Sera lied to me, time and again she lied to me. I never knew she was hurt. She never told me she was attacked. Never did she ever tell me in her heart that something like this happened.

I am the Heart of Stars, I can read hearts. I can hear what Sera tells me in her heart.

When we are not together she talks to me in her heart, and I answer back too. She never said this, never ever, that Shylock, that bastard, did something like this. She had bled because of him, she could have died if her father wasn't there. The page still has blood stains I don't know from where or whose, and of course her favorite stain- tear stains.

I would have killed Shylock right then, only if I knew.

"Maybe that's why she didn't tell you." I turn around on the intruder and find it's my past self. He, like me, can read hearts and might have read mine too.

"maybe." I shrug. How could I not notice this fact earlier.

"Because you were too busy dwelling on the facts that you are hiding the truth and then she is hiding something as well. I am you, and I won't lie to myself. Kevin, I don't know what the future holds or what it is that brought you both here but I do know something very important, in love there's no war between the heart and mind, there's only love. Krius, doubt kills trust and trust is a feather once lost it can never be regained."

"Trust her, she still needs you, more than ever now, maybe." Past-me tells me.

I nod and he pats my shoulder and leaves. I close my eyes and try to focus on what she is doing. I am a lover, I reside in her heart, always. I can always catch glimpses of what she's doing or thinking.

Her image starts clearing as I concentrate my mind on my desire to know. She is sitting staring at her hand, I am trying to read her mind, she's thinking that even my past self doesn't feel like me, wait what?

Did he meet her too? Anyway she has closed her eyes and she is deep in her thoughts. She blames herself for all of this, huh?

I break out of the trance, her thoughts are too dense and dark. I couldn't bear it.

What is she up to!? Oh Merlita! protect my love from her ownself.