Dealing With The Marauders

Yes

Chapter 22: Yes

-bex p.o.v.-

At first I wasn't sure what I felt. Maybe confusion, but not really. And shock, though not completely. Happiness, but hindered. Anger, yet simmered.

How could he throw this at me all of a sudden, but then again, why would he hold this back for so long? How had he loved me for so long yet never announced such a thing? How could he think that dumping his feelings on me would make all of this okay? Why had he not done it sooner?

My feelings were a bundle of mixed emotions, contradicting thoughts all yearning for attention. Each emotion was trying to push its way to the top of the list, fighting for recognition.

I blinked. I needed to think.

Sirius looked as if each passing second would be the end of his life. "You know, Gorgeous, leaving a bloke in silence for this long doesn't help his ego." I could tell by the nervous chuckle that escaped his lips that he was waiting quite impatiently for an answer. I wanted to give him an answer, but first, I needed to figure it out of myself.

The way Sirius made me feel was definitely something that I didn't want to leave. I didn't think I could just let go of that so suddenly, not after it had been a constant in my life for a while now. The looks Sirius gave me always started sparks through my body and the feeling of his gentle touches always caught me by surprise.

There was definitely something different about how my body responded to him after I had learned of my love for him. I began to notice the little things about him and the way he acted towards me. My senses had heightened when it came to Sirius.

I loved him. I had already figured that out, but did I really want to bring him into something he could easily escape from? Something he need not be a part of.

If I allowed Sirius into my life, that would mean I was letting him be a part of the prophecies about myself. It would mean he now had a front row seat to the horror film that represented my life. It meant that he was now in danger.

Would I really be so selfish as to force him into the spotlight of danger?

I looked up, having decided. But something stopped me short, my eyes connected with Sirius'. His stormy eyes held mine. I soon became hypnotized by the deep swirls of grey. Oh how I loved his eyes. If there was one thing about Sirius I loved more than anything else, it would be his eyes.

The deep set eyes were a mystery that deserved to be solved. They almost begged to hold eye contact for all of eternity; and I was more than happy to oblige.

I am a selfish person.

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So um yeah. Sorry it took so long to update. Not too sorry about the length though; I feel like the depth of the chapter and the thoughts it was meant to provoke are enough to make up for the length.

Hope you guys liked it and understood what I was meaning to get past.

Comment, vote, share, fan, and follow? Thanks.

Much love.