You got a speeding ticket even when you're packed
You haven't blink since the last lunar eclipse
You grind your coffee beans in your mouth
Your eyes stay open when you sneeze
The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse
You can jump- start your car without cables
You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug
You don't tan you roast
You walk 20 miles on your treadmill before you are realising it is not plugged in
Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil
Cocaine is a downer
you get nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee
