𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

9

Cody woke up from sleeping to see it was dark out. The boy sat up slowly and looked around the room he was in slightly confused as to where he was. It all came back to him in a rush of peppermint and yelling. Cody winced at the memory of Miranda yelling slurs at him. He laid back down an rolled over in the bed wanting nothing but to sleep forever.

He had always heard stories about how people's parents would kick them out over small things like this but he had never seen it happening to him. With that thought he fell back asleep and cascaded into dreams of boys who smelled of forests and wore sweaters.

---

The next time the boy's eyes opened it was daytime, he had slept practically since yesterday morning and felt the effects of his oversleeping behind his eyes. He looked lazily at the clock. 7 am. He realized he could still make it to school so he shot up and walked out of the room quickly he was searching for Jamie when he remembered it was Saturday. Face palming silently he tip toed back to the room not wanting to wake up anyone in the large and empty house. It was so quiet that Cody had plenty of time to sit and think over everything that had happened. Unfortunately he got nowhere and was walking circles in his mind.

Eventually Jamie wandered in and Cody leapt off of the bed only to sit back down so he didn't look so eager. He decided to be more discreet now that Jamie knew his big secret, he crossed his arms and tried to look nonchalant as Jamie raised an eyebrow at him. 

"How'd you sleep?" Jamie asked softly walking over to sit on the bed next to Cody.

Cody tensed up immediately as he gazed into Jamie's eyes. The thoughts began rolling as Jamie put his hand on Cody's shoulder. 

The homoerotic tension sat heavy in the air and Cody couldn't help but wonder if Jamie felt it as he leaned into his touch.

"Not well- a lotta dreams about Miranda and my dad." the blonde murmured.

"I'm sorry dude, it'll get better I promise."

Cody smiled gave Jamie a smirk and sighed heavily, "Do we have to go to practice today?" he practically groaned.

"Yeah, it might make you feel better y'now endorphins and that shit."

Cody sighed again bowing his head muttering a fine.

He didn't think practice sounded exciting and endorphins? How would those help him right now? He simply couldn't see the practicality in going to practice when he was trying to figure out his own homosexual agenda. Cody felt as though his mind was working against him forcing him into inescapable corners of endless questioning.

Jamie tapped him on the forehead three times gently with his index finger- something they had done since they were young, it was supposed to clear the bad thoughts- "You look like you're over thinking, just let loose it'll be fine."

Jamie shrugged and stood up stretching, he walked out of the room with Jamie on his tail and he wished for a second that maybe just maybe Jamie would walk up behind him and embrace him intimately. It didn't happen to Cody's dismay.

---

It was around 3 pm when Jamie and Cody finished their movie and decided that getting ready for football practice would be a good idea. Cody was terrified that somehow he was going to walk into the locker room and all of them would just know. They would immediately target and harass him. He could feel it, like an itch on your back that you can't quite reach.

As he pulled his duffel bag over his shoulder and headed out the door with Jamie he considered pretending to feel sick or even forcing himself to hurl on the side of the road so he wouldn't have to go. He wouldn't have to try hard. But he shook the thoughts off at the last minute and climbed into Jamie's car. 

The ride there was silent as if Jamie somehow knew that if he said anything to Cody the boy would burst into tears. Cody didn't like to admit that he actually cried a lot, it made him feel less masculine because of the wonderful standards of society. 

When the two arrived there was a hesitation in Jamie's process of taking the keys out of the car like he wanted to say something but he simply took the keys out went around the car and grabbed his duffel bag. He waited patiently for Cody to follow suite. The blonde sat in the car a million thoughts racing through his head before finally getting out of the car and grabbing his bag. He slung it over his shoulder and smiled at Jamie trying to hide the obvious anxiety that was wracking his mind.

Jamie gave him a brilliant smile back and put a comforting hand on his back before the two of them started walking towards the door.

Cody felt the air change as he stepped into the locker room, like suddenly the oxygen had been sucked from his lungs. His eyes flitted from side to side before finally focusing on his feet moving forwards, he didn't want anyone to think he was looking. The locker room had never felt like a dungeon until this moment, he wanted desperately to leave to go back to where it was safe in Jamie's car. 

Until the fog of his mind cleared. Jamie placed both of his hands on Cody's shoulders and looked him in the eyes with frightening intensity. 

"No one knows, and no one will know until you are ready. Stop worrying okay?" 

It sounded more like a demand than a question but Cody nodded feeling like he might melt under Jamie's touch and finally took a breath when Jamie turned around to continue walking. Cody sighed for what seemed like the 15th time that day and continued towards his locker, he would get through this. Little did he know that this would be one positive step towards facing the fear he had built up inside of him about his newfound taste for the same gender.