blueberry pancakes // bucky barnes

the one with her sister

"No! You flip them after three minutes, or when you see bubbles popping across the top!" Lily laughed as she nudged the taller man that was arguing against her. He seemed to flinch gently at the way her arm brushed against the cool metal of his prosthetic, causing goosebumps to pop up on her fair skin, "Too long on one side will cause it to burn."

     She could feel his eyes baring down into her. Trying to read her small movements and the different mannerisms she had. Trying to decipher the thoughts that ran through her head at a mile a minute. He was studying her, learning about her, just simply by watching. The way her hands gripped onto the spatula firmly, but not too hard. How frail and thing her fingers were, the way her neck dipped gently before hitting her collarbone. The marks under her eyes, more likely than not, being the results of countless hours at work. The dips in her cheeks whenever her slightly dry lips upturned into that charming half-smile she did.

     But most importantly, how her chest would rise and fall at a quicker rate when someone spoke directly to her. Her mouth parting gently as the rapid breaths were sucked in and pushed out. The tinge of pink that hid beneath the surface of her cheeks, creating a rose hue around her.

     "and done," Lily stated, flipping the final pancake onto the stack that sat opposite of the two, ready to be devoured by the enhanced individuals around her.

     The second Lily placed the plate at the end of the bar, the team snatched them away in seconds, including Bucky. Lily pursed her lips and slid her hands across the soft material of the grey kitchen towel that sat in front of her on the silver countertops. Watching everybody's eyebrows perk up positively, causes Lily's pure heart to swell three sizes larger. Knowing that it was because of something she created alongside the man that had luckily grabbed her attention. Something no one has everthanbeen able to do for the last four years of her life. It was...surprising.

     Ever since her divorce, Lily has busied herself twenty-four seven. Denying that there were still fresh wounds carved into her heart like preteens initials carved into a bridge. The damage that was done to her self-esteem becoming borderline permanent because she refuses to acknowledge the fact that it's even there. Lily had convinced herself, that if she were to admit the pain she was in, and come to terms with the suffering she had been through, Scott would win. He would succeed in breaking her completely, which seemed to be his goal from the moment they met. To take that joyful innocence of Lily's personality and twist it into something darker, colder, and more damaging. But if she continued to act as though there was nothing wrong, that she had healed from the divorce...then he wouldn't win. He would continue to be the jerk who was unsuccessful in his plan to manipulate her personality and destroy her internally.

     Whether she admitted it out loud or not, Lily knew, deep down inside of her heart and soul, that he had done exactly that. And by ignoring, a beast was created. A hungry, no, ravenous, monster of insecurity and self-pity, feeding off of the anxiety that coursed through Lily's veins on a day-to-day basis. Growing stronger as the days passed, absorbing more and more of Lily's once peaceful and loving personality, turning her into a distant, self-loathing, ball of pain. All because of one man who managed to entwine himself into her life, and rip it apart from the inside.

     "These are amazing, Lily. Much better than Bucks," Steve teased, shovelling another fork-full of pancake into his mouth, "They kind of taste like the ones we had at a nice little cafe yesterday."

     Lily nodded along as he spoke, but didn't find herself looking at him. Instead, her eyes wandered to the scruffy man that sat to his left. Hand gripping the fork with an indescribable amount of care, as though he would break it if he held on too tight. Lily figured it was due to the fact he was a trained killer, an assassin for all of those years of his life. Being a doctor, she dealt with psychiatric issues in children, but adults and youths aren't that different when it came to mental health and damage done to their brains. She could tell from his gentle lingering over everything, that he believed he was still dangerous. Tip-toeing through life, praying he wouldn't cause a ripple in the waters around him, sending off tidal waves.