If There's a Reason He's Still Alive

trente

Thomas POV

I'm sitting in my office right now, eating homemade mac-and-cheese from a thermos. So far, today has been fairly uneventful: I did some paperwork in the morning, played chess with Alex on a touchscreen (he won), talked with some patients in the community room, went back up to my office to file more paperwork, and then watched the movie of the day with Alex (it was Little Mermaid).

I scroll mindlessly through my email, noting that one of the deadlines on a report I was writing has been changed. I make a note to finish the conclusion when I get home today. Another email informs me that tomorrow is a staff spirit day, and I should wear green tomorrow. I'm almost about to click out of my inbox when I see my Priority inbox has one notification in it.

The subject of the email reads: "Urgent - Meeting Regarding Patient Alexander Hamilton, #56041, TODAY at 2:30."

Oh fuck. 

I decide not to get ahead of myself and open the email.

To: thomas jefferson@goldsberryhospital.net, johnlaurens@goldsberryhospital.net, georgewashington@goldsberryhospital.net

From: angelicaschuyler@goldsberryhospital.net

(A/N: Do not send emails to these addresses. Please.)

Fellow colleagues,

After much review of Alexander's files, I have determined that Alexander may be eligible for release from this hospital setting and transfer to an intensive out-patient program available at a hospital. I'm hoping that we can meet today to discuss if Alexander might be ready for such an event. I wish you all the best.

Angelica Schuyler, Director of Psychology

Marked as Read

I should be excited; heck, I should be jumping with joy right now. This is Alexander's chance to get everything we've worked for for about a year now, this is what I've been trying to lead him towards ever since we met. So why am I not overjoyed right now?

In these past few months Alexander has pulled away from me, turning our friendship into more of a professional relationship. It's almost like he knew this was coming and wanted it to be easier on me. 

Me, on the other hand?

I think I've fallen in love with him. 

It started slowly; I noticed the tiniest things that he did for me and started blushing like a child whose crush started talking to them on the playground. Then it got stronger.

The more he pulls away, the more I fall hopelessly in love. There are a million reasons why this shouldn't be happening, but it is for some reason, and I can't build up enough courage to force myself to stop it. The most prominent reason is, of course, that he is my patient; to engage in a romantic relationship with a patient is strictly forbidden at the facility. I understand that, of course; it's there to protect the patients and the quality of care they receive. That doesn't mean I silently resent the writer of that law. 

I mentally slap myself and start preparing notes on Alexander, which I'm sure Angelica will want to read at the meeting today. I try to distract myself from everything, but he keeps coming back.  

~ Timeskip brought to you by the tea. Today's flavor is Bengal Spice, it's really delicious. ~

The three of us file awkwardly into Angelica's office. John closes the door behind us.

"Good afternoon, gentlemen," Angelica says. "Alexander has, according to the notes collected by staff observing him, improved immensely since he first came to the facility. So immensely, in fact, that upon reviewing his files I was prompted to consider his possible release from our facility. But of course, you all know that. John, would you like to start us off?"