Silent Whispers

Chapter 23: Pacifying the Uncertain

Khushi watched Jaya hum to herself, powering through her evening chores as if they were a piece of cake. It was a welcome sight after spending the whole day in her room, mulling over the unexpected happenings of the previous night.

"Should I heat up dinner Madamji?" Jaya asked.

Khushi stared at the maid, who, over the years, had come to mean nothing less than a younger sister. She was her next source of support every time her brother was away, and she was yet to let her down.

"I will wait for Bhaiyya," Khushi said. "Isn't he coming home today?"

"Yes, but he called a few hours ago and said not to wait for him. He will be very late."

Khushi groaned. She looked forward to seeing Shyam, who was absent for the past week, working on a special case in Mumbai. He was the only one who knew how to rest her uneasy mind, though of course, she was in no position to tell him the reason for her turmoil in the first place.

She kissed Arnav.

No matter how many times she repeated that in her head, it still didn't sit right. Why couldn't she resist the urge to give in to her selfish desires? She was never a woman of impulse or for that matter, insanity. Where did she fall short?

Khushi knew there was no answer to that. At least that's what she believed. She didn't think she would be able to handle the storm that would come if the reason behind her actions yesterday was not just a spur of the moment decision, but something more.

"Madamji?" Jaya called, gently tapping her shoulder. "Should I warm up the food?"

"Huh? No... that's fine. I will eat later. You go on with your work."

Jaya nodded and proceeded to the small mandir in their house. Not wanting to be left alone, Khushi quietly followed her.

However, when she entered the small prayer room, adjacent to the hall, she was intrigued by the idol that stood in the center. Magnificent in size, it was of the goddess Durga, who she always assumed was a manifestation of blind belief in traditions; she wasn't sure if she still did.

"Do you pray everyday Jaya?" she asked, suddenly curious. If everyone in the world believed in prayers, surely, there was some truth to it? 

The maid smiled. "Yes, Madamji. My mother says we should never keep the prayer room in the dark. A lamp should always be lit."

Khushi vaguely remembered hearing the same, though she didn't know why. "And if we don't light a lamp?"

"My mother says it's not good for the house. But I don't think so Madamji... Devi Maiyya is very nice, she wouldn't let anything bad happen to us."

"You really think she will do that?"

Jaya paused. "It's all about faith Madamji. If you think she will protect you, then she will."

"So, you really do have faith?"

"Of course! If I don't, I wouldn't pray for Maaji everyday."

Khushi didn't reply.  She knew the solution to her mother's health wasn't as simple as praying a statue, she was much too educated for that. However, she also knew that there were no other options. After all, what else could she do other than wait for the doctors to finish the treatment and hope it was for the best?

The shrill ring of her cell phone suddenly interrupted them. Khushi paled upon seeing the caller-id; it was Arnav. Distancing herself from Jaya, she cautiously picked up the call.

"Hello?"

"It's me."

"Yeah... I know."

An awkward silence settled between the two, as Khushi began to recollect the questions she almost forgot to address: What was Arnav thinking? Was he upset with her? Did he misjudge her for initiating the whole thing?