Let's Start from the Beginning (one shots)

a decision

I didn't want to wake up this year re-reading the same chapters of my life. Chapters riddled with insecurities and the fear of the public. 

I didn't want to wake up with the worry in the back of my mind that I was ruining my career. 

This man sleeping next to me has allowed to me love openly. Not just love him, but love me more openly. Love the life that I am living and the experiences that I am getting. 

So why do I continue to live my life in hiding? 

I guess the people around me that matter most know. My cinderella group knows. Our parents know. Even some if not most of the industry is aware of our relationship. 

.....But my fans don't know, and it hurts that they don't. I want to share this happiness in my life with them without negative comments and scrutiny. 

I've spent 21 years of my life building my career. I don't deserve the negative comments for loving someone. 

Son Ye-jin's mind races with a million questions, a constant push and pull between what she wants to do and the fear of the consequences. She's in no terms a pushover, but she's broken herself over and over again to get where she is in this industry. 

The contemplates how loving someone shouldn't be the end of her or her career, but even in this day and age it's considered a "scandal." Hyun Bin has never been the type to silence his heart. He's loudly and boldly claimed any relationship he's been in. He's a gentleman like that, never wanting the woman to face the unnecessary consequences of double standards in the society we live in. 

She's so lost in her thoughts that she does notice Bin gazing at her. 

"You're doing it again," Bin says as he reaches out to pull the lower lip out of her mouth that she has been chewing on; "and then you'll be mad about your swollen, dry, and bloody lip." 

"Are you thinking about that again? Revealing us?"

Ye-jin replies "Yeahhhh. I mean it's scary. It's been so much fun being private and dropping hints. I've enjoyed the process of getting to know you without all the cameras facing us. But I'm also tired of limiting my freedom - our freedom as a couple." 

"Listen Ye-jin-ah, I completely understand and I hold nothing against you. How could I? You're my forever love and you make me a better person every day. I am extremely happy with how we are going and I want you to feel safe and secure no matter what." 

"Ugh Bin, what did I do to deserve you? I feel like I'm asking you to constantly compromise. We've also spent a stupid amount of money to secure pictures from dispatch. It's so annoying." 

"Ye-jin-ah, it's all okay. The most important people in our lives know, and that's all that matters. Let's just go at our own pace and respect each others' wishes. Now, will you stop the monologue in your head, and let's go back to sleep?" 

Despite agreeing, as Ye-jin shuffled back into Bin's arms, her mind wouldn't stop racing about the pros and cons of her decision. 

Despite her fears, despite her need to control everything and protect everyone in her life, she had finally come to a decision: she was ready to let the world know. 

With that decision, she gradually fell asleep against the rhythmic breathing of Bin's chest.

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A couple of hours later, she woke up lighter having made her decision. She turned in her bed to find Bin to tell him only to not find him there. At that moment the waft of coffee hit her nose and lead her out to their living room. 

Watching him make her breakfast and set her table made her even sure of her decision. 

I have to stop letting my fears control my life. I have a man I love so much and I am confident in our relationship. Just because I tell the world doesn't mean I have to lose my bubble; my world with him. 

"Ye-jin you're up. Are you hungry?"

"Goodmorning Bin! You know I am hehe, but before we start eating, I wanted to talk to you about something"

"Yes of course. What's going on my love?" 

"Bin ummm, I'm ready. I thought about it so much for so long and you know I love you and I was scared because I've seen what happens to people when the world finds out and I just know I keep asking you to compromise and I'm sorry but I am ready whatever happens it'll always be us at the end of the day  I --- " 

"Ye-jin you're rambling - breathe" 

"I know I'm sorry, I just want you to know that I am not playing around about this. However, for some reason, you don't seem as ecstatic as I expected you to be."

"Well, I just want to be sure that you're genuinely making this decision for yourself. I know me and our relationship play a big role, but at the end of the day, baby, this is about dealing with your insecurities. It won't be easy. People might be bashful or say hateful things about either of us. Can you deal with that?"

"Bin I promise you I have thought through all the scenarios possible, you know me the ever overthinker. I am ready, and as long as you and I are together we will support each other through anything and everything." 

"I think I have an idea to make things a little easier for us, Ye-Jin"

Ye-jin stared at him questioningly, urging him to continue. 

"What if we say we've only been dating for 9 months. We took some time apart after CLOY to figure our feelings out and make sure it wasn't just our characters talking. I mean I know the public isn't blind and has seen our behind-the-scene videos where it's like way too obvious we have feelings for each other. But if we just tweak it a little, we could avoid any professional issues and keep things clean. What do you think?"

"Mr. Hyun Bin, this is exactly why you're the CEO of VAST. I love the idea. It's the perfect compromise." 

"So we're actually doing this?" Bin says as his eyes light up. 

"Yes, we are. Love me publicly Kim Tae-pyung" Ye-jin replies with the brightest eye-smile. 

Bin kisses the back of her hand; "Thank you Ye-jin, I cannot thank you enough. I know this wasn't an easy decision for you, but you still made this decision despite the possibility of us never having to reveal it. You constantly amaze me and I love you." 

"Thank you for being patient with me, I appreciate you every day. I love you too. Shall we eat?" 

"Yes, let's eat" 

Putting their worries aside, they disappear into their own bubble like they will even after the world finds out. 

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Hello readers, it's been a while. I've been wanting to write this since we all finally officially found out that BinJin is real and thriving. Just so happy for this group and I hope we get to see them thrive. 

Hope all of you are well and staying safe,
Deepblueocean