Sush...(completed)

3

There was a thick wall of darkness all around. The dense trees in the forest amplified the monstrocity of the evil night and the bitter bubbles of terror seeped into the veins of the little child. He was alone, he was petrified. The hairy, humungous monster was chasing him. It had sharp, dirty teeth that can tear steel apart, and it's blood red glowing eyes were enough to make anyone cry to death. He ran and ran. He ran till the last of his breath. He just saw the monster eating his mother up. He was there, when the hairy  nefarious creature tied the woman for his own inquitous pleasures and bled her. The monster ruthlessly ended her joy of purity, pushing her into the ghastly fire of guilt, shame and self mutilation. The child saw her mother screaming, cursing god and then squealing in pain, disgust and horror as the creature scoffed,sniffed and cackled in amusement and joy. Tears of horror ran down his cheeks as he saw the monster bathing in his mother's blood and dancing. The child was there, he was hidden behind the weeds but he there. He saw it all, until he made a mistake. He sobbed loudly and got the creature's attention. The filthy hairy being chased him. It chased him to neatly drag out the life of the kid. And the child, he had already reached the dead end. No where to go. He turned back in  terror to see the hideous looking monster standing in front of him. It smiled at him - A smile of enjoyment, mockery - as if it probed the kid that he was the next target then. His breathing stopped heart pounced so much so that it seemed the nerves and veins had burst open by the gush of adrenaline rushing inside his body. But he could do nothing but to see the creature trudging towards him with hands raised..And then it pounced on him cutting open his chest, spattering his blood everywhere and  painting it all over its body.  

                                        "Twinkle Twinkle little stars, how I wondered what you are.." The monster sang in a tone of baleful joy...Dancing on the opened body of the child..

I sat on my bed, shocked and frozen. My therapist call it a PTSD - Post traumatic Stress disorder. The same dream, the same visuals have been haunting me for the past fifteen years. Time is the biggest healer they say - and that's what the biggest prejudice is. You can run from everything, but you can't run from time. Your past will chase you till the end of time and you can't outrun it. The pain, struggles and atrocities of the past will always remain there in your life as an untreatable, incurable, ugly scar. 

"Hey Sophia." I called my slumbing therapist as usual. " I can't sleep."

"Amaan, it's the same dream again?"

"Hmm." I exhaled pointedly.

"Amaan you need to put down your walls. Until you do so, nobody can every help you. You have to forgive yourself Amaan. And you have to forgive the other. Just face the emotions, don't surpress it. And now, please for god's sake think something positive! Or otherwise I seriously have to prescribe you nerve numbing Haldol! I will meet in your next session." Sophia hung up the call. Better said than done. 

I was awake for the rest of the night. The city looks beautiful from the 25th floor Swissotel room,where I have been staying. Kolkata- The city of love...Well said. I chuckled to myself as I remembered her smiling, chirping face looking at me in peace. Shailza, the name is not in fashion; fascinating just like her. But then, chain thoughts took me over. Why was the tree uprooted? And what was the figure I saw? Was it my hallucination? What did Shailza see that her face became so pale? Then why did she lie to me? There were so many questions going on in my mind. But the first things first.

The next day, I scheduled my day accordingly, I went to meet Mr Sen. Along with a  major bone dislocation on his left arm which was freshly operated and ligament tear in his left leg, there were several other minor cuts and scratches that he suffered from. 

Mr Sen, precisely Mr Aniket Sen, was a very trained associate and a close friend of Mr Das. We have been meeting for the deals. A very informative person who knows the in and out the Vedic Village and Mehra Hotels and Chains deal. He was my subordinate for the inspection day. I waited outside his cabin till I got clearence both from the Doctors of Peerless Hospital and Mrs Malati, his wife. When I entered his cabin, the same weird feeling gushed through my veins. Somehow I felt uneasy. It was kind of the same when I met Shailza, but this uneasiness was not there before. I felt guilty, somehow It was my responsibility to take care of my subordinates. It felt as if a huge stone was thrown on my chest and my heart crumbled into a million peices under its weight. All these feelings mingled together into a new feeling.   

"How are you feeling Mr Sen?" I asked softly, filling up a chair just beside his bed. He straightened at my sight and then delivered a welcoming smile at me.

"Khub bhalo..ei...mera matlab bohot accha. Atleast better than yesterday. Doctors gave me pain killers and sedatives to ease the pain." He said.

"Chalo yeh to acchi baat hai...Mr Sen, Kal kya hua tha? I somehow lost track of the boundaries, I know I shouldn't have but I became engrossed in a conversation with a lady.." 

"A lady? Sir there was no woman in the site yesterday." He informed. I pushed my head back in surprise. 

"You must have missed Aniket but there was a woman named Shailza Mathur who visited the site. People have seen her."  I replied.

"No sir, what I heard from Suranjan yesterday was that you were speaking to yourself for the entire time. They saw you leave the site alone. I was checking the details and coordinates when suddenly I felt a huge thrash and then I blacked out. People told me that a tree fell on me." 

"I was speaking alone?..How can it be? Its impossible.." 

It was all going above my head. Sometimes I see a sillhoutte and then people say I was talking to myself. I was not. Neither of it was a hallucination. - I thought. Neither Shailza nor the figure. I became convinced that something was off about the whoole thing. I desperately needed to make it right. If it was a mental off, I still needed it to be right and if its was conspired then the need manifolds ten times...