why am so horrible

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Why am I so horrible that I have to make everything up as I go  like I'm just horrible why just why just why I wonder why I'm just sucky piece of trash that fucks everything up I hate myself i blame myself and I'm sorry for anyone I hurt I'm just not good enough and I can't go screw it up please let my other side come out and choke me out or something least I won't be ruining people lives

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