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"Jisung, do I look gay to you?" Donghyuck enquired very openly, standing with the younger in the queue for lunch. Jisung, however, couldn't quite work out whether he was being snide or genuinely curious.
"Depends. I'm not entirely sure that someone who's gay has a look, y'know? Like Mark. He's like every other teenager, so I guess it's a lifestyle choice as well? Expression of self, y'know?"
"Okay, then do I feel it?"
The blonde shrugged, sighing like this was the most ridiculous conversation he had ever had. "Hyuck, everyone is different. It's like asking you whether I feel straight or not. There's no way to tell for sure."
The older groaned, tilting his head back and wishing for answers. As they moved further along, the taller chewed at his lower lip in hopes that his next question wasn't a bad one.
"Then....do you feel gay?"
"What?"
"Well, I don't know. Suddenly you're asking me these things, and it looks like you're hoping to confirm something. Has a boy piqued your interests, or is this a toxic masculinity thing and someone has offended you?"
Donghyuck grimaced, envisioning the kiss he stole from Mark and wanting to know very much what it meant. "I.....I may or may not have started feeling something for a guy. Not emotions that I'm familiar with...."
"Gay?"
"Ugh, I don't know if I'd call it that though, Ji. I don't like boys, I just like him. Does that make sense? He's different from everyone else.....He's special."
Jisung watched as the older's eyes drifted off into the canteen, almost looking someone that wasn't around. His conscience told him to give his friend a helping hand, yet another part of him felt that he needed to stay out of this. "This boy is in our year, right?"
"Mmm. He doesn't know how I feel, and I don't plan on telling him."
"Isn't that cowardly?"
Donghyuck sighed, looking up at his blonde friend and shooting him a determined expression. "I don't care if this is called 'running away'. I shouldn't feel like this in the first place, and besides......"
"Besides?"
"I'm pretty sure this person already has someone they're interested in. I've been trying to prevent it, but I can't be this selfish, can I?"
Wow, Jisung thought, collecting a tray from the countertop and walking back towards their table. He's really an idiot.
"I'm such an idiot," Mark wailed as he lay his cheek on the dark wooden dining hall table. Jaemin squealed as his soup rattled from the impact of the older's face against the surface. "Someone turn off my heart, please. I can't take it anymore....."
Renjun scoffed, sitting back and shaking his head. "Yes, you are an idiot. No matter how I look at it, you've fallen for someone who's done nothing but abuse you for years. I say it's best to get over him."
"God, Jun. You're so unromantic," Chenle hissed, smacking his shoulder. "No, Mark. You're feelings are totally normal, and whatever this asshole says is horseshit."
"But he has a point," the oldest mumbled sadly, looking up at them through his dark lashes. "The day Donghyuck looks my way will be the day Renjun grows another foot."
"Wow, let's all attack Renjun then!" The victim scowled, though there was remorse evident in his hazel eyes as he played with his long sleeves. "I came off as mean, and I'm sorry. But I want what's best for you, and that guy has never wanted anything but trouble for you, Mark."
Jaemin was stuck on the fence in this situation. He didn't actually have too much of a problem with Donghyuck, though he didn't agree with how Mark had been treated throughout the past three or four years.
"Lately, I can see that you've been getting along much better," Chenle remained optimistic. "He's actually acknowledging you as an equal."
"You make him sound like a dictator," Mark frowned, though it wasn't far off. He really was making large mistakes here.
"Look, all I'm saying is that you have to be careful," Renjun spoke softly, directly and honestly. With his figure leaned forward slightly, it was obvious that he was being dead serious. "Broken hearts can be avoided. And for boys like you, whose interests lay in each other, people like Donghyuck will shatter that heart."
"So you're saying I should forget about him?"
"If that's the only method of protection, then yes-"
Chenle slammed his hand down on the table, "Don't be like that! This is the first time he's shown any proper interest in someone, and you're steering him away!"
"These could be the early signs of having a bad taste in men," Jaemin stated unhelpfully. "But I'll support whatever Mark wants."
The ravenette made a frustrated and angry noise into his hands as he rubbed his face. "Carrying all this as well as barely catching a lick of sleep, is torture. At least the sleeping pills prevent me from waking up to, y'know....that."
"Speaking of which, how will you solve this problem?" Renjun tilted his head with a bemused look in his eye. "Surely he doesn't want to keep this sort of relationship up."
"There's nothing either of us can do," Mark responded tiredly. "He was walking around again last night, before the medicine kicked in...."
"Shouldn't Hyuck be taking some as well?" Jaemin suggested. "That could work-"
"No! He doesn't need to take unnecessary harmful drugs!" The oldest interrupted, raising their attention.
"Oh dear," Chenle chuckled after a brief moment of intense silence. "Our Little Markie really is whipped. You probably should reel those raw emotions in a bit."
So easy, the ravenette thought as he rolled his eyes, because feelings can obviously be flipped like that.
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I know this was a filler guys, and I'm sorry to say that there will be a couple more to build up to the turning point for our idiots. I'm already depressed knowing this story is almost done TT...it felt like yesterday that I started it.
