daisy [l.h]

deux

She always wonder what would happen if things go differently. Maybe she wouldn’t be so sad and everyone would actually love her. But no, things had to go the way it is. She is fucked up and nobody loves her.

But if things go differently, she wouldn’t meet the rooftop boy (yes, she called him the rooftop boy), and the thoughts of him wouldn’t cloud her mind. Taking up all the empty spaces inside her head and fill it with his face, his voice, his touch and just him.

That sounds so cliché like those stories on the internet, but that doesn’t mean it couldn’t happen in real life right? Anything could happen, as cliché as it sounds. And these things came on unexpected times. And no, I’m not trying to say that she likes him (not yet, I guess), she is curious. A normal thing someone would actually do if there’s a stranger on top of a building in the middle of the night trying to stop you from dying, and not to mention he is also attractive.

I mean – okay, scratch the attractive part. You’d be curious too, right? And that’s what got her here. Her feet dragging her to the same rooftop. She opened the door slowly, am I really expecting him to be here? She thought it was ridiculous to actually think he is here, but who knows?

She closed the door and looked around. Her lips curved upward a little bit when she spotted the boy sitting close to edge of the building. And now it seems like her feet has been set to move itself closer to him.

“What are you doing here?”

She jumped a little, not expecting him to know about her presence. She didn’t answer, instead she sat down next to him. “Well,” She stated.

“What do you think I’m doing here?” She asked and he chuckled, closing his journal (she’s assuming it is a journal) and putting it back in his bag.

“Well, I think you want to try a real jump?” She rolled her eyes as he looked up at the sky before turning his head to the girl, “Or you want a piece of paper with my number written on it, huh?” That one made her blush, she didn’t even think that far, she was just curious. Yeah, curious. Only CURIOUS.

“You’re so full of yourself, aren’t you?” He just shrugged then say nothing in return. So, they just sit there – again – their lips stay still, their hand holding the other one, their eyes staring ahead with their thoughts that’re – probably – stuck on the other galaxy right now.

They’re here. Together, yet they still feel like no one is there. Like they’re alone again, no one to accompany them on the long, tough, journey. Whatever kind of journey it is they’re facing. They’re lonely, just like the last time, the last last time, and the last last last last time.

“You know what?” He turned his head to her, earning a ‘mhm’ from the girl. “If you want to try a real jump, just spit it out.”

She felt like she could choke on air. This boy is really something. “Well, I would want to try that for real, only if you demonstrate it first.” She smirked, folding her arms on her chest. And, oh, that was totally not serious, ever heard of a joke?

And he looked at her for a while, this girl was close to be dead yesterday and now she’s making a joke about jumping off the building, is she serious? And he thinks about the girl for the hundrendth time that day, and he concludes that; this girl is really something.

“Really?” She looked at him confused. “Do you not know how to jump? Here, just stand this close to the edge, and ju – “ She screamed and hold his arm back when he was about to actually do a real jump. She hold on to his arm and her heart is pounding in her chest and it feels like it could burst anytime.

“Why are you so calm?”

He chuckled, “You already asked that, do I really need to answer it again?” She shook her head (as in a ‘no’), her hand leaving his arm. “Do you . . .” She stated, her eyes focusing on the ground that seems more interesting now.

“Do you ever think of jumping too?”

He showed a little smile, she didn’t even know it was a smile. “All the time.” She swallowed the lump in her throat. So he is, feeling the same?

“You deserve to be happy.” She repeated the exact same words he said yesterday, maybe he’ll know that I also care. She doesn’t know what he’s been through, let alone his name. But I’m sure I really want him to be happy.

And so, he let out another small smile and it didn’t seem to matter to him if she notices or not. And now it sounds silly, knowing they both tell each other to be happy, wanting each other to listen and understand, when they can’t even listen, nor understand.

So, did he or she say anything else author? No, and that’s the story of how they got trapped in another never ending silence THEY created. Having thousands stars on their mind, but doesn’t let any of them fall down.

But, overall, they’re just two messed up teenagers. Tired of everything, of being sad, afraid. Tired of being a fuck-up. Tired of the sleepless nights, the tears. Tired of being hurt. Tired of being tired.

And now that this story has just started, where do you think it would end up? On some streets in Australia? On some rooftops? Or on the stars? This story probably isn’t what they think it’s gonna be, but possibly what YOU expected it to be.

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ok what the fuck did i just write oh ymgofh i didnt know where that words came all i knOW IS I GOT SAPPIER (and a deeper person) WHEN ITS LATE ADIOS