Not My Life || Dramione.

Chapter 4

A/N: Welcome back, here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.

This Chapter mentions some triggering things so if you don't want to read anything like that, then I would suggest maybe not reading. Please tell me what you think.

..............................................................

3 months later.

I wake up alone in bed, something that almost makes me sad, since my nightmares of Lucius started about 3 months ago, Draco has been comforting me, we cuddle at night and most mornings I wake up alone, which makes me sad to think that we are so close at night and in the day we are almost strangers. I get up from the bed and walk into the adjoining bathroom, I have a quick shower and get dressed into a pair of jeans, a white long sleeved top and some blue ballet flats.

I look at myself in the mirror, since being married I have gained weight and I look more like myself I have in a long time, my hair is long and wavy, almost reaching my bum, it looks healthier than it did 6 months ago. I stare at myself for a long time before I make a decision and turn away from the mirror.

I tug and my now shoulder length hair nervously as I enter the common room, Pansy looks up from her magazine and gasps slightly, making Ron look in my direction. "Wow, Hermione, that looks really nice." Luna says from Theodore's lap, I smile kindly at her before I sit down next to Pansy who gives me a small smile before looking back down at her magazine.

A couple of minutes later Blaise and Ginny arrive with small smiles at everyone as they hold hands. "We've got news, guys." Blaise says with a smile, we all look at the couple. "I'm pregnant." Ginny says softly with a small smile at she looks at Blaise who kisses her forehead gently. "That's great guys." Luna says with a smile as she pats her stomach softly with a smile at Theodore.

"I wanted to wait until everyone was here but Ron and I expecting also, we found out a couple of days ago." Pansy says with a smile, Pansy and Ginny hug each other with excitement and Luna claps her hands together happily.

In their happiness they didn't see me leave the room, I could feel panic start to rise in my chest, so I run as quick as I can to find a quiet and dark room before it envelopes me. I lie against the cool wall as I sob and breathe heavily, my mind showered in thoughts or horror and terror, my mind goes back to what happened to me a year and 4 months ago.

I go into these states every time anyone mentions being pregnant, it all started when Astoria announced her pregnancy and then a month later when Luna announced hers, now Ginny and Pansy were going to have babies. The thought of pregnancy or being pregnant doesn't scare me as much I thought it would, I think I'm scared that I will loose them, like with Leopold or that if I don't have a baby in the time limit then I'll be taken away from my friends and that I'll be hurt like what happened with Lucius.

I lay on the floor for a while, trying to calm my mind, without Draco around, I realise the only way out of my head is through pain, so I painfully start picking at my Mudblood scar, that will never fully heal, I scratch at it until blood starts to stem from some of the letters, I eventually start to calm down but I have no energy, so I stay laying down. I don't know how long I stay there until the door opens and light spreads through the room, my eyes are still slightly blurry from crying but I see a figure come towards me.

"I've found her." I hear a male voice call from in front of me, realising that it is Draco's voice, I close my eyes. "Hermione, can you stand up?" Draco asks me calmly, I groan and shake my head tiredly, I feel him take my arm, the one with the scar. "Hermione what happened to your arm?" Draco asks with a hint of concern, he must have noticed the blood on the white sleeves, he pulls the sleeve up and gasps quietly, I pull my arm away and shove the sleeve back down.