Innocence [ spencer reid x reader ] ✔

fifteen: pinky promise

TW: mentions of drug, drug abuse, drug withdrawal, withdrawal symptoms, emetophobia

You walk into the BAU early the next morning, donned in a pair of gray high waist pants and a black blouse. Your heels clack against the tile floor, echoing around the empty bullpen. No one is here yet—no one except Hotch. You walk toward his office quickly, knocking on the wood door.

"Come in." His voice is tired, punctuating the words with a sigh.

You open the door, Hotch immediately standing when you enter. You clear your throat, awkwardly looking at him as you stand in the threshold of his door.

"Y/n. Sit, please. I wasn't expecting you."

You sit in front of him, taking a deep breath as your eyes flick up to his. "I wanted to talk about yesterday." Hotch doesn't react, and you swallow, biting the inside of your cheek. "I'd like to apologize for yelling."

Hotch laces his fingers together, setting them on his desk. "Emotions were high. Obviously there were...issues that needed to be addressed. I didn't handle things in the correct way with Spencer—"

"You knew?" You ask, scoffing. "You knew Spencer was going through something and—"

"If I told anyone in the Bureau, he would've been terminated. Do you want that?" He asks firmly.

You exhale, shaking your head. "No."

"I understand he's a member of this team and you care about him. We all do." He tilts his head. "I'm sorry we didn't do anything sooner to help him." His voice is soft.

You cross your arms in front of you. "Hotch, I'm sorry for yelling, but I'm not sorry for what I said. We should've been better friends. A better team." You avert your gaze, biting your bottom lip. "I should've done something sooner." You look back up at Hotch. "I went to his apartment after I left. He's...I poured the Dilaudid down the sink. He wants to get better. Go to meetings, stay clean."

Hotch nods. "That's good."

"He's going to go through withdrawal, Hotch," you explain. "Based on how long he was using and the drug he was using, it's going to take anywhere from six to ten days for him to feel normal again. He...he shouldn't be alone. I'm requesting time off so I can be with him."

"Y/n—"

"He doesn't have anyone, Hotch." Your voice is thick, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. "He doesn't have any family over here. We're his family. I...I..." Your voice trails off, unable to tell Hotch the truth.

"You care about him," Hotch says aloud, raising his eyebrows.

"We all care about him," you retort.

"No. You care about him. More than a team member." His tone isn't accusatory or angry, just curious. Inquisitive. "I noticed last night. We all did."