What Could've Been

if I wasn't dishonest

C H A P T E R 4

*Trigger warning: alcohol abuse and drug use*

R E I

I was sitting on the porch, drinking away my sorrows when I felt someone sit by me and tap my shoulder.

"Rei?"

I recognized the voice immediately. It belonged to someone that I honestly didn't want to cross paths with but what could I do when they called my name and tapped my shoulder?

"Hey, Hailey." I turn to look at her and gave her a tight-lipped smile before refocusing my attention on the bottle I had in hand.

I think she took my polite greeting as an invitation to encrust herself into my personal space because she's now linking arms with me. I awkwardly unlink our arms and shift away from her. Her face momentarily twists in confusion before she realized how awkward that action was given our history.

Once upon a time, we were friends. Friends who happened to like the look of each other and with that, we became friends with benefits. But that was all before I met Lanelle. After getting into a relationship, we went back to having a platonic friendship. However, I couldn't maintain my friendship with Hailey and my relationship with Lanelle as these two constantly clashed heads so eventually, Lanelle gave me an ultimatum - Her or Hailey.

Of course, I picked Lanelle but even that couldn't salvage our relationship.

"What are you doing here?" Her lively voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I turn to really look at her. She looked the same as I remember. Her dark brown hair was perfectly curled, and her natural but not-so-natural makeup was craftily applied to accentuate her brown almond eyes, small buttoned nose, and heart-shaped lips. She was all dolled up and wearing a sparkly silver mini-dress. The only difference is that her eyes looked sadder and she seemed thinner than before which I never thought could be possible as she was stick-thin.

"What? Am I not supposed to be here?" I asked, I couldn't help the gruff in my tone.

"No, it's just with Mark here I thought you wouldn't turn up."

"I'm just trying to chill in peace," I said, hinting that I wanted to be alone but it seems Hailey wasn't getting the memo. Her company was going to sober me up and that's the last thing I wanted to be.

"With alcohol? I have something better."

"And what could that be?" I ask, watching her closely as she pulled out ecstasy pills.

"Do I look like a crackhead to you?" I was low-key offended that she'd offer me hardcore drugs. Did I look that miserable to her?

"You don't have to be a crackhead to have a little fun so... want one?"

I stared at her outstretched hand and back to her face. "I'm good."

"Suit yourself," Hailey said as she shrugged her shoulders and casually ingested one.

"Since when have you been popping pills anyway?"

"That's none of your business." She was quick to shut my question down.

I was about to interject but I remembered we weren't friends anymore. So here we were, in an uncomfortable silence with me trying not to let my mind wander to a certain someone. As soon as it did, I took a drink.

"It helps me escape my grim reality." Hailey suddenly confessed. What could be grim about her reality? She was swimming in Daddy's money and had the school population at her fingertips.

"Are you okay?" I ask absentmindedly.

"Oh, I'm fine except for the occasional nightmares I have of your girlfriend's mean right hook. Did you teach her some tricks or what?" Hailey smartly switched the subject which I was grateful for as I didn't really care to hear her life story, I just asked because I had nothing else to say. Maybe not saying anything would've been better but wouldn't that be considered insensitive?