Fools in Love

16. Trials of the Socially Inept

Relationships change, often when we least expect it and in ways not originally fathomable.

Matt: I'm bored.

Me: Five more minutes of class. You'll live lol

Matt: I'm fairly certain I'm already dead.

Me: Emo

Matt: It's not a phase, Mom

Me: lol sure, sure
What do you want for lunch?

Matt: Sushi

Me: Boujee

Matt: Nice rhyme
Also shocked you know that word.

Me: I think that's an insult?

Matt: Maybe :)
Getting out of class now. Meet you at the library in ten.

Me: Ok, see you soon!

Matt and I have been texting...a lot; all throughout the day, even during shared classes where we sit apart. So much so that I assume the slight vibration of my phone signals a message from him. Ridiculously enough, I'm disappointed the few times when the text is from another. Then I feel like a jerk because, apparently, I don't have a single bad bone in my body. Not even a bad-ish bone. Unfair.

To add to this change, we have started eating lunch together in the library too. The first time Matt requested resulted in my immediate panic. I know, not shocking, but his question was super shocking, ok! I didn't say no...because I didn't want to. Giving a lie to Tori to keep him off my back, now that was difficult, but I managed. Now, lunch time together has happened a few days in a row. I grab Matt's meal from the cafeteria. He repays me when we meet up in a quiet corner. We eat together while engrossed in whispered conversation.

There are mostly students working on assignments on the first two floors of the library. Floors three and four are meant to be silent floors and, due to that, are so empty that Matt can get by unnoticed. Our hushed whispers are never called out either. I'm not sure why this started or if it'll end. Will it? Do I really want it too?

I know the answer already.

"Hey," Matt says when appearing around the bookshelves looking as handsome as ever. Sometimes I hate him for it.

"Hi." I smile. He returns the gesture, enticing me with ocean eyes and sweet smiles, sitting across from me as usual.

We're by the window, admiring the cooling campus below. By now the leaves are starting to change. Each day is a little different, sometimes sweltering heat or chilly enough for a jacket. Today is a day for a jacket due to the breeze, gray skies and light rain. Matt's sporting a navy hoodie, which I've found to be a good color on him. What color isn't a good color on him though? A question for another day.

"Mini golf tomorrow then?" he asks, reminding me of our cancelled plans last week. My stomach does back flips while my heart takes notes from olympic gymnasts and scares the shit out of me with far too terrifying performances.

"Sure, I g-get off at three as usual."

"I'll pick you up."

"You don't have to."

"I know, but I want to."

I'm short of breath from simple words accompanied with a warm smile that is growing more familiar by the day. I question if Matt is even aware of what he's doing. The preferential treatment I've been receiving is like one brick stacked upon another, building hope until it's a skyscraper reaching into the clouds. I'm waiting for the inevitable shattering earthquake that sends me crashing back to reality.