Chapter 28
"How are you these past days, Sien?"
Nginitian ko ang therapist at nagkibit-balikat.
"Getting better... I think."
Tumango ito at ngumiti pabalik. May kinuha siyang chart at may sinulat do'n bago ako muling tiningnan.
"Do you still have a hard time sleeping at night?"
"Twice or once in a week, I think."
"What have you been up to these days?" She asked after writing down something.
"The usual... but I'm starting to read some books you recommended."
She smiled. "That's good! Do you still cry a lot? What do you think changed after our last session?"
Huminga ako ng malalim at tumango. "I still do... nothing changed much really. I'm still trying to be kinder to myself."
Tumagal ang session ng isa't kalahating oras. Pagkatapos no'n ay lumabas na ako ng room at kinausap naman ito ni Tita. I've been undergoing therapy for two months. Iyon kaagad ang inasikaso ni Tita pagkarating namin ng Manila.
It was uncomfortable at first. I couldn't express my emotions well but Dr. Guzman helped me get over it. It's been two months and I could say that I'm starting to get better. I cut all my connections to most people I know, I took a break in social media and I focused on my therapy.
"Sien, Mia is here."
Tumayo ako at kinuha ang gym bag ko. Pagkatapos kong kausapin si Tita ay lumabas na ako para tingnan si Mia. She smiled when she saw me. She's one of my high school friends and she's the only one who knows that I'm in Manila.
"Tara na, nagsimula na raw sila."
Another month passed and my therapy just ended last week. The Doctor said that I could just come back if I feel like I need it again but I hope I don't anymore. Last month, I started joining dance classes with Mia to keep myself occupied.
Pagkarating namin sa ikalawang palapag ng gym kung nasaan ang dance class ay agad kaming pumwesto dahil late na kami. The dance instructor pointed us. Pinandilatan nito kami kaya natawa na lang ako.
"Ano? Tuloy ka na?" Tanong ni Mia habang nagpupunas ng pawis.
I drank on my hydro flask and nodded. Kinuha ko ang towel at nilagay sa balikat ko.
"I'm leaving next week."
Ngumuso ito at umupo sa tabi ko. Tinapik nito ang aking balikat at pareho kaming humarap sa mga nagsasayaw. They're the new batch, tapos na kami at mamaya ulit.
"Babalik ka naman 'di ba?" Tanong niya.
Ngumiti ako at tumawa. "Syempre, it's just for two months. I need to go back so I can prepare for the FEU-CAT."
"Akala ko sa Philippine Women's University?"
I shrugged. "Tita changed her mind. Aniya, mas gusto niyang magtapos ako sa alma matter niya."
"Sabagay, FEU is good. May kakilala akong nag-aaral do'n but she's taking nursing."
We talked for a while and when the DI called for our batch, tumayo na ulit kami. The next week, I left for Hawaii with Tita and Tito. I will be staying with Tita Carmen and her family. It's a good thing since my closest cousins are there. After two weeks, bumalik din si Tita at Tito sa Pilipinas.
During my stay there, I visited so many places. I also created new social media accounts and my friends there were limited. Si Tina lang ang kakilala ko from Cagayan. When we talked, kinamusta niya lang ako at ang buhay ko sa mga nakaraang buwan. I can sense that she's being extra careful not to mention anything to me, adding that I am not asking her anything.
