Oh My Heart! [YiZhan FF]✔️

-3- Time problem and memories

-3- Time problem and memories

Zhan was unable to concentrate much on the lessons in the following lessons until lunch break and preferred to look at his new classmate Wang Yibo. And during the lunch break in the cafeteria, Zhan realized that he was probably one of the few who neither knew Wang Yibo nor his family.

Many other students, especially the female ones, came to their table to talk to Wang Yibo. But he sent them all away annoyed and said each time that he was only there to have lunch in peace and not to chat. Zhan thought it was a bit harsh to react like that, but he was happy, nevertheless, because he had the chance to get to know him better. Because unlike the others, Wang Yibo had no problem to answer Zhan's questions.

And so Zhan came up with all kinds of questions about Wang Yibo's life and listened eagerly to his answers. Maybe it was that Wang Yibo was new at the school and could tell interesting stories about himself, which is why Zhan liked him so much. Stories like about the competition he participated in with his group, they sang and danced and won. Or that he races motorcycles in the junior league, can ride skateboards and snowboards, and does lots of other great things that Zhan could not even dream of doing.

So he also told Zhan that he has a big brother and that he has finished university and they moved to Beijing together, where his father has been living and working since a long time. Finally the family is living together again and his father does not only come to visit once a month anymore. Wang Yibo's brother also starts working for his father.

But while all these stories were new and interesting to Zhan, most of the students of this school already knew them. So Zhan had heard from the neighboring table that Wang Yibo's father is a very successful businessman, who made his beginning small business, big and famous through hard work. Only Zhan has no idea which company is meant and he doesn't really care.

When Wang Yibo wanted to know from Zhan when he had time to study and train, Zhan thought about it for a long time, and then came to the weekends. Wang Yibo asked him why he didn't have time during the week in the afternoon after school, and Zhan told him, "I have to work. After that I have to go shopping. Then I have to prepare dinner at home for my stepmother and her sons. Clean the twins' room, the laundry is also still waiting and then I have to do homework and study too."

Wang Yibo looked at him in horror and asked if it was only today and Zhan shook his head. He didn't know how to explain to Wang Yibo that it is like this every day and why. Chuyue took over this part for him, completely unasked and unbidden. He told Wang Yibo that Zhan was treated like an employee at home and even worse. He also told Wang Yibo that his stepmother got worse when Zhan's father died and that she blames Zhan for his death because Zhan caused so much worry and grief to his father that his already weak heart could not cope with it.

Zhan was stunned that Chuyue just blabbed all this out. Because it was one thing Zhan liked to hide from others. Especially that with his father. Because although Zhan now knows that his father had a weak heart and the many flights were not good for him, he still blamed himself. After all, his father died just one day after his eighth birthday, and that just after Zhan stubbornly faced up to his father's new attempt to reconcile with him.

He remembers his father saying that it would hurt him that Zhan no longer spoke to him. And he also remembers seeing his father grab his chest several times that evening and painfully make his face warp. But as an eight year old he didn't know what this meant and his stepmother didn't understand it either. She spent all the time he was at home with him.

When his father's will was read, it was only two weeks old. He wrote, that it would hurt him in his soul what he had done to his own son and how much he regretted not believing Zhan. More specifically, he actually wrote a will that was like a letter addressed to Zhan. And even today Zhan remembers every word.

"To Zhan, my wife and her stepsons,

if you are reading this, I died. Today I received a shocking diagnosis from the doctor. He says my heart is so ruined that nothing can be done and it is uncertain if I will even live another month. I hope that when I die you will not have to watch me die. I have traumatized you Zhan, enough already.

I'm sorry that I never gave you enough time to mourn the death of your mother and also afterwards, not for you as your father was there. I am also sorry that I confronted you with your stepmother and your stepbrothers with finished facts. I should have talked to you about it. But I didn't think and thought you needed a new mother and that's why I quickly looked for a new wife.

I can only tell you that it hurts me in my soul what I have done to you and that I didn't trust and believe you, my own son, and beat you in my anger and despair. I cannot find words to describe how much I regret all this. I love you so much my son and I am afraid that you will never forgive me. And I am even more afraid for you and your future.

When I come home especially for your birthday, I will try to talk to you again and explain to you once more how sorry I am and I sincerely hope that you can forgive me. I miss hearing your voice, your laughter and even more I miss your happiness. I took it all away because I allowed a woman and her two sons to come between us.

I believe you now and I am already taking precautions so that you will not lack anything even after my death. I hope your future will be better than the present. Stay strong and never let yourself be defeated. Remember I love you and no matter what happens, this is not your fault.

To my wife and her sons I would like to address these words. I welcomed you into my family and I hoped you would be a good mother to my son as you are to your sons. But I was wrong, and just because I do not want my son to be all alone when I die, I will not divorce you.

In the future you will get money from the trustee for my son so that you can send him to a good private school and that he will never lack for anything. You and your sons will get a part of your inheritance and the rest you will get when my son is 18 years old and ready to live on his own. If you neglect, deport, torture or do anything else to my son that could harm him, you will not get any more money.

You will lose the right to your inheritance, as well as the house I am leaving to you so that my son will have a home. The trustee and the notary will explain everything else to you.

I love you Zhan, your dad.

Xiao Lou!"

Zhan could remember it so well because the notary gave him a copy of this letter and Zhan read it every night before bedtime for three years.

"Hey, so I'll see you on Saturday? I heard there is a training ground in the park, we could use it to get you fit for the sports day. And we can learn English after that." Said Wang Yibo, ripping Zhan from his thoughts of the past.

"Oh um, yes. I think I could finish my work by 1 pm on Saturday. And we could also use the breaks at school to practice or study." Zhan replied.

"Are you alright Zhan?" Asked Wang Yibo, who looked at him worried.

"Yeah sure, why do you ask?"

"Because you are so pale. If you're not feeling well, tell me and I'll take you to the nurse."

"No, I'm fine. Um, when you're done, why don't we go back to the classroom? Our next teacher is really strict and prefers that we are in the classroom minutes before class starts so that we don't start unpacking when class has already started.

"Of course, no problem. Let's go." Wang Yibo replied.

Chuyue, who probably realized that he was going too far when he gossiped about Zhan's life without permission, apologized to Zhan and promised him that this would be the first and last time. Zhan nodded, but was still disappointed. But he forgave his best friend because he knows Chuyue well enough to know that he meant no harm.