Omoide

Part 4

Play ▶️ "You were Beautiful" - Day6

They say time fly too fast, any moment in life could be just a memory after some days. We could miss it, rewind it inside our head and also forget about it.

Memories are the things we keep on replaying or thinking before sleeping at night when we're alone or when we can't sleep yet. No matter how happy or sad they are, we just keep remembering them even if we don't want to.

And Nai, for a month suffered from it. Whenever he would lay at bed and wanting some sleep he would stay awake until 3 a.m. thinking about those good old times. Thinking of the person who made him happy for a long time.

Nai can't stop thinking how funny it is, he lived for 19 years without Joong Archen and he was fine, everything were just routine but then that guy went to his life.

For only a year they spent together, Nai felt how suffocating it is now that he's not with him anymore. No more calls, no more dates, no more doing skin care routine together, no more cuddles, no more hug or kisses and everything. He's gone. And Nai is longing for him so much like a person addicted to nicotine.

Their moments together turned into a happy memories that makes him insanely sad until the sun says hi.

Today was no different, he woke up late once again.

Forced his own body to get up and make some noodles. Started to eat unhealthy food once again since there's no giant boyfriend to cook for him anymore.

He became lazy to take care of himself, he is really such an ironic person-- how dare he to tell Joong Archen that he must take care of his self yet here he is being shitty to his own self.

Nai heaved a sigh as he try to force himself to eat. Everything he does now is against his will.

Yes, he's alive but dead inside.

He fixed himself and then he went to the company, it's just the same old reason why he went there, to practice.

Upon entering the room his mates quickly greeted him, giving him an awkward smile. He knows too well that he is being pitied by his friends. It's been a week since Joong Archen decided to leave and not be part of the boy group anymore. Instead he intended to work solo as a model and an actor.

Nai was shocked and at the same time he felt guilty when he heard about it- of course, Joong Archen wouldn't want to work with him. He caused him pain-- Joong will surely want to move on and heal.

And that's when Nai realized how selfish he was, because he still hoped that Joong will not forget about him and that he will still chase after him.

But no.

Joong Archen, wants to cut him off from his life.

"Are you okay?" Ben asks Nai, as he offered his hand to help Nai to stand up.

"I'm fine, let's continue practicing." Nai responded coldly as he continued practicing their choreography.

"Hey, but it's water break already." Dome said, as he got up on his own.

"Nai, rest first, it's water break." Pavel said as he tried to turn off the music but Nai glared at him. The leader didn't have a choice but let him be, not wanting to make the latter upset more than it is.

"You're gonna get sick, Nai." Earth warned.

"I'm fine." Nai replied. The boys looked at Nai, worried. They all know that Nai has been punishing himself. They already tried to approach him and talk but no use.

He is isolating his self from others.

After some hours of practicing, the director came to the practice room.

There was a happy smile on his face and Nai hated it. He didn't even gave the man a wai, even though he's the boss. Nai wants to erase those smile so bad.

The director threw some speeches but Nai just stared at him with a glare that he didn't even bother to hide.

"By the way, Joong is here to say goodbye for now. He was casted by a big company to act in a big series. Good thing they will film at turkey." When Nai heard those from the greedy man, he felt like his world shattered into pieces.

Nai couldn't even process everthing yet when
the man opened the door and then Joong Archen stepped in, Nai was stunned.

He is still charming as ever, well groomed and shining. Nai felt his heart beat faster like he just saw his long time crush after not seeing him for years but in reality it has been just a week when he didn't see Joong Archen.

Nai somewhat felt good that Joong Archen is doing well. Unlike him, who cries at night just to fall asleep.

The boys approached Joong congratulating and asking how he was but Nai stayed where he was like his feet was attached to the floor.

He looked at him in a distance, admiring his unique face features, his smiles and listening to his voice. god, he missed him so bad.

"A dream?" Nai whispered to himself as he pinched his arm.

"No." He gasped, he flashed a smile- a smile of full of hope. He stared at Joong again but when their eyes locked for a second. Nai saw nothing at Joong's eyes- no sign of longing or even love.

He looked at Nai like he was a completely stranger then after that the latter said his goodbye and turned his back.

Nai wants to call him so bad, stop him from making another step but the heaviness he is trying to defeat him.

'But It's now or never' Nai told himself and finally he called him.

"Joong--" Nai called as he took a step but stopped right away as he felt a stinging pain from his head. Sight started to blurr and his body suddenly gave up.

"Nai!" He heard his friends called, after that he just felt that he was being carried and everything went black.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨   ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

- someday, everything will be just a memory.